On Thursday , I went to the first booze-tasting event held at a Denver liquor store since Prohibition.
A new state law allows Colorado liquor stores to hand out free samples, provided they get approval from their municipalities. Denver finally signed off.
Of course, this same legislation also lowered the blood-alcohol limit for driving a car from 0.10 to 0.08. Given mixed messages, I planned to take it easy.
The booze-tasting event was at Argonaut Liquors on East Colfax Avenue, one of the city’s largest liquor stores. It was sponsored by the Distilled Spirits Council of America, which never, ever uses the word “booze.”
“We like ‘spirits,’ ” explained Sarah Rosen, a spokeswoman for the booze-peddling group.
That other word “brings up negative connotations,” Rosen said.
Not to me. To get free booze, I had to show my driver’s license to an Argonaut employee who recorded my name, birth date and license number. This data will go on file with the state. I don’t know what the state will do with this data, but I am generally not paranoid when I drink.
I then met Terri Hamilton, a state certified drink-pourer, trained to recognize minors and people who have already had too much booze.
As required by law, she tallied my intake and cut me off when I’d reached the store’s limit.
All this regulation quickly dulled the excitement of getting free booze.
There was a sign on the bar that said, “Samples must not leave the sample area.” But the samples were so small that they would evaporate before anyone could take a few steps toward the door.
Ron Vaughn, owner of Argonaut Liquors, kept the samples to a quarter of an ounce so nobody got a full shot, even after four tries. “This is not so people can come in here and cop a buzz for nothing,” he said of the booze giveaway.
It’s not? So why bother?
“You’ve been in Whole Foods on a Saturday and tasted jalapeño-cactus cream cheese and had it on some kind of granola-wheat cracker?” he said. “In the liquor industry, we want to have the same opportunity to let our customers try things that they would not ordinarily try – either because they were not familiar with it or because of the price.”
I can distinguish between jalapeño-cactus cream cheese on granola-wheat and, say, margarine on a saltine, but all booze tastes like fossil fuel to me.
The Distilled Spirits Council would like Americans to think of booze tasting in the same way that they think of food sampling or wine tasting. So here’s my review of the four premium boozes I sampled:
Woodford Reserve bourbon: Burned my throat and tasted like gasoline.
Maker’s Mark bourbon: Burned my throat and tasted like gasoline.
Wild Turkey Kentucky Spirit: Burned my throat and tasted like gasoline.
Cruzan Estate Dark rum: Burned my throat and tasted like gasoline.
“Would you like to try a little water with that?” Hamilton, the certified drink pourer, asked when she saw me wincing.
No. Making this face is all part of the distilled-spirits experience to me.
Today, thanks to the Distilled Spirits Council’s lobbying efforts, 25 states and the District of Columbia allow liquor stores to offer samples under highly regulated conditions.
“It’s all about asking people to trade up,” said Rosen. “You like rum? Why not try the high-quality rum?”
The council, which has also been pushing states to open liquor stores on Sunday, is doing a fine job of changing local liquor laws to benefit its members. It’s also doing a fine job of marketing.
Sales of spirits have been up about 4 percent a year nationally for the past few years, said Rosen. Beer sales, meanwhile, are losing their fizz.
Today, spirits are now so competitive that beermakers have to keep coming up with wacky ideas to keep up with them.
In October, Budweiser began marketing caffeinated beer to lure young drinkers away from hard liquor. It’s called B-to-the-E, which stands for “beer with something extra.”
Apparently, it’s not enough anymore to just be “King of Beers.”
Al Lewis’ column appears Sunday, Tuesday and Friday. Respond to Al at , 303-820-1967, or alewis@denverpost.com.
