Earlier this month, a survey of 1,003 likely voters found that 71 percent of them believed Congress should pass some new laws to “keep the Internet safe.” They weren’t alone. The results of another survey were released Thursday. This one sampled 5,000 online shoppers, and 42 percent of them said they planned to reduce their activity on account of “phishing” scams and various attacks on sensitive data.
Clearly there’s a problem, and the law-enforcement approach isn’t working well because it’s so hard to find the miscreants, who could be just about anywhere in the world.
Thus we need to look elsewhere, and perhaps the answer is to upgrade Internet users. After all, if you want to drive on our highways, fly in our skies or carry a concealed weapon, you need to pass a test.
Granted, it would be nearly impossible to force people to pass the test before they started surfing and e-mailing. But we could arrange matters so that you had to pass before any law-enforcement agency would accept your complaints, and Internet service providers could require potential customers to pass a test before starting service.
To get things started, here’s a proposed quiz. There’s no techie stuff, like knowing the difference between an IP and an ISP, but anyone who can pass it should be able to avoid at least 90 percent of the hazards of the Internet:
1) If someone you don’t know sends an e-mail with an attachment named “BrittanySpearsNaked.gif.exe,” you should:
a) Click on it and look at the picture.
b) Forward it to a friend.
c) Double-click, then have a geek friend come over and clean your computer.
d) Delete the e-mail without opening on the attachment.
2) You received a notice that there has been a potential security breach of your PayPal account, which requires you to send confirming information to restore the account status. But you don’t have a PayPal account. You should:
a) Provide the requested information as quickly as possible, since it might be useful to have a PayPal account.
b) Go to the directed website to see if it looks like the PayPal website.
c) Figure that if they really want to find you, they should have your phone number.
d) Delete the message and ignore it.
3) You’re really concerned about viruses, Trojan horses, spyware and malware infecting your computer. You should:
a) Subscribe to several anti-virus programs and run frequent updates.
b) Install a firewall and e-mail filtering.
c) Wipe your hard-drive and re-install Windows XP, along with all your software, at least once a month.
d) Switch to Linux or Mac OS X and get on with your life.
4) You receive an e-mail from the daughter of the former Nigerian Minister of Petroleum Exportation. Her father left her US $25 million, but it’s frozen in a Cayman Islands bank. To recover this money, she needs your help and will pay you $5 million. You should:
a) Drop everything and help this desperate woman by sending her information about your bank account so the funds can be transferred.
b) Run a Google search to find out whether this Nigerian minister ever existed or had a daughter.
c) Ignore it and delete the message.
People who can pass this simple four-question test should be able to cope with the online world; in time, we’ll have a safer Internet, although there will doubtless be new scams and cons.
In the meantime, if you want the answers to this test, just send me an e-mail with a major credit-card number and issuer, the security number on the back, your Social Security number, your home telephone number and mailing address, along with your mother’s maiden name. I’ll get right back to you. Honest.
Ed Quillen of Salida is a former newspaper editor whose column appears Tuesday and Sunday.
