Monday should have been The Worst.
The theory, concocted by Scottish psychologist Cliff Arnall, went something like this: It’s January. Days are short, pine needles are embedded in the carpet. Not only has the plug been pulled on the holiday lights, but the bills for that grid-depleting display are in, stacked alongside Visa-provided proof that restraint was not this year’s holiday theme.
And the pants that were supposed to fit again after New Year’s aren’t cooperating.
Arnall didn’t even factor in the Broncos’ fate.
But he did factor in W for weather; D is debt; d, money coming in for January; T, time since Christmas; Q, time since New Year’s resolutions failed; M, general motivational levels; and NA, the need to take action.
Put it all into this handy formula – ([W + (D-d)] x TQ /(M x NA) – and Jan. 23 equals the worst day of the year.
Well, mathematics has its place, but apparently not in Denver.
From the downtown jail to the Southwest YMCA – and the Evil Bean coffee shop in between – people were smiling, relaxed and generally loving life.
If anyone should have been miserable, it was Linda Trujillo.
But, even as she entered Denver County Jail to serve her sentence for a traffic violation, she was all smiles.
“I am having a good day, actually. I was supposed to do 30 days with an ankle monitor, but now it’s only five days. So this is cool,” she said.
It was the same over at the Evil Bean coffee bar in Writer’s Square. At the bottom of the hanging menu, customers are warned: “Special orders are $29.95-$89.95, depending on our mood. No bad days!”
Employee Jessica Ausec lived up to that credo. “I’ve had the giggles all day,” she said.
Relaxing along the 16th Street Mall, New Mexico firefighter Eric Trevizo said, “Isn’t that weird? Today is the worst day. The sun is shining. … I have no worries.”
To be fair to Arnall, Denver’s balmy 49-degree high was more conducive to happiness than Scotland’s usual winter gloom.
And, some resolutions are already slipping into the past. In an alley off the 16th Street Mall, Jeramie Dennis, 25, took a quick smoke break, continuing the habit he tried to end Jan. 1.
“I failed after 7 1/2 hours,” Dennis said, though he didn’t let it distress him.
For others, debt is a problem.
“Certainly, this is a main time for people to begin to try and take care of debt,” said George Shoemaker, executive director of the Colorado Center for Financial Education.
And the Broncos? Surely, for them, Monday was unbearable.
They lost the AFC championship game and the chance to go to the Super Bowl. But no one in the Broncos organization wanted to talk about it.
As spokesman Jim Saccomano put it: “It’s a flip story, and what we do here is not flip.”
Failing that, it seems many people opted to kickbox away their sorrows.
According to Arnall, New Year’s resolutions about exercising should be history by now. But members of the Southwest YMCA didn’t get the memo.
Susie Janecek, health and wellness director, said, “We were busier than ever today. Our personal trainers are hopping, classes are full.”
Well, take that, Mr. Arnall.
And, as Janecek said before hanging up the phone, “have a nice day.”
