Editor’s note: This is a transcript of a live chat with DenverPost.com advice columnist Scott Seale, a.k.a. . 
Tue Feb 14 11:11:25 PST 2006 DPO moderator- audience) Happy Valentine’s Day everyone and thanks for participating in our chat! Scott should be joining us shortly, but please feel free to start submitting your questions now.
Tue Feb 14 11:14:23 PST 2006 Great Scott- audience) Happy Valentine?s Day and welcome to the Great Scott chat room, a great place to spend your lunch hour! It feels nice and cozy in here Alright, now let?s have some fun! Oh but please, no smoking (per the new Colorado chat room ordinance)?
Tue Feb 14 11:14:47 PST 2006 DPO moderator- audience) Yay! Ok Scott, here is your first question …
Tue Feb 14 11:14:54 PST 2006 blondie- audience) How can I rid myself of a ridiculous, insecure feeling of jealousy? Isn’t it an ingrained emotion that if it’s there, it’s there?
Tue Feb 14 11:17:00 PST 2006 Great Scott- audience) Jealousy = insecurity. You have to know that nothing can ruin a relationship faster than the one-eyed monster. Relationships are tough but through communication, you can resolve the problem. Get that reassurance that you need!
Tue Feb 14 11:17:05 PST 2006 gbear- audience) Hey Scott, what do you think of big age differences between people in a relationship? Does it matter if it’s the man or woman who’s older?
Tue Feb 14 11:18:43 PST 2006 Great Scott- audience) No but it depends on what ages we’re talking about. For instance, if one peron’s 16 and the other is 35, there would be some issues (not to mention legally) that would not exist say if the ages are 30 and 45. I wrote a column about this last year and got some major flack for it.
Tue Feb 14 11:18:48 PST 2006 Joanie- audience) I have a friend who’s Mom wants to have another kid. The problem is, she’s almost 50 (my friend is 16). I don’t think is a good idea, because my friend’s Mom will be almost 70 when the kid graduates. What do you think? Shouldn’t she be enjoying her senior years instead of being a Mom all over again?
Tue Feb 14 11:20:22 PST 2006 Great Scott- audience) I wrote about this too, another controversial topic. Let’s be realistic. After 40, there are going to be a much higher rate of complications. 50 is up there for having another kid. Why not adopt?
Tue Feb 14 11:20:29 PST 2006 shoelov*r- audience) Do you think all this talk about emotional cheating is legit? Can’t you write a flirty e-mail to someone you never see once in a while and not feel bad about it?
Tue Feb 14 11:21:36 PST 2006 Great Scott- audience) If you’re writing a flity email, you’re flirting. Think how you would feel if your partner was “emotionally cheating”. It’s still cheating because you’re putting your energies into someone who is not your significant other. It’s wrong.
Tue Feb 14 11:21:44 PST 2006 buskyandme- audience) I have an ex-husband who will not go away. Once again I dread answering my office private line because I know he will be calling with “Happy Valentine’s Day Gal!” Would love to say GO AWAY! But any feedback from me only gives him a reason to call me more… What should I say?
Tue Feb 14 11:22:51 PST 2006 Great Scott- audience) Be clear with him. If you’ve done that, be CLEARER. Tell him it’s over and not to call you. The poor guy won’t let go so grab him by his emotional claws and pry them off!
Tue Feb 14 11:22:58 PST 2006 JonasP- audience) What has been the most romantic Valentine’s Day you’ve experienced and why?
Tue Feb 14 11:23:28 PST 2006 Great Scott- audience) Me? Well that would have to be today with you. Awww how sweet!
Tue Feb 14 11:23:35 PST 2006 Bill- audience) Why do so many people still submit to enslavement by these “Hallmark holidays”: Valentine’s Day, Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, etc.? Wouldn’t it be a better idea to simply show our significant others how much we love them every day of the year, instead of enriching a card company and forcing our mates to ingest fat-laden chocolates?
Tue Feb 14 11:25:57 PST 2006 Great Scott- audience) Well, our beautiful country is all about commercialism so Valentine’s, Mother’s Day and all of that are an industry and another reason for companies to cash in. Yes it’s overrated but today is still a good way to say I love you, I want you, I want to do you, etc.
Tue Feb 14 11:26:01 PST 2006 youknowwho- audience) How do people deal with long-distance relationships? My boyfriend is in Dallas, and we see each other once every couple of months but we live online in IMs and e-mails, and on the phone. This is no way to keep a relationship going, right?
Tue Feb 14 11:27:31 PST 2006 Great Scott- audience) LDR’s are hard. Really hard. Relationships are hard but those long-distance things are something entirely different. IMing and emailing is fun but nothing beats having that person physically “there”. No, it won’t keep going, at least not long term. One of you will eventually meet someone else. Sorry…
Tue Feb 14 11:27:38 PST 2006 lori- audience) Hi Scott & Happy Valentine’s Day! I very recently met a younger man that seems really into me! How lucky am I, right?? Anyway, the age difference is about 13 years and he is from S. Africa, I am white. Any advice on facing these differences positively??
Tue Feb 14 11:28:50 PST 2006 Great Scott- audience) Happy VD to you too! You know what I mean. The way to face your age and race differences is to pay no attention to them. Don’t make it an issue and there won’t be one.
Tue Feb 14 11:28:55 PST 2006 Joanie- audience) Can a high school breakup ruin your life? I’m afraid I love my boyfriend too much, and I know we’re both young and even if this doesn’t work out, there are a lot of boys in the future. But it’s hard to thinkof that right now.
Tue Feb 14 11:30:36 PST 2006 Great Scott- audience) Of course, temporarily. Relationships at your age are so dramatic, there’s no two ways around it. Enjoy your relationship for what it is and remember how young you are. Chances are you’ll end up with someone else and if you do breakup, that’s what you’ve got your friends for. Probably the only thing good about a heartache is that we’ve all been there.
Tue Feb 14 11:30:41 PST 2006 Lindsay- audience) Scott, what is your favorite (in Denver or online) sex-toy shop?
Tue Feb 14 11:31:30 PST 2006 Great Scott- audience) I don’t use toys, I use my bare hands. Oh, can I say that?
Tue Feb 14 11:31:36 PST 2006 gdawg- audience) Hi Scott. So, I stayed with a lady well past the time you advised me to leave. Yes, she is inconsiderate, dishonest, manipulative, and yes, she returned to her wealthy former BF, who nearly led her to kill herself. My question today is – how the heck do I trust my feelings (esp. re emotional cheating), avoid being a doormat, and still be a gentleman?
Tue Feb 14 11:33:34 PST 2006 Great Scott- audience) You have to take people case by case. Not every woman is inconsiderate and manipulative like your ex, that is unless you have a thing for picking them that way. Continue to be your kind self and you’ll find someone much better. After her, you can only go up!
Tue Feb 14 11:33:38 PST 2006 JonasP- audience) Scott, I’m addicted to the newness/giddiness I feel when I first start dating someone. When that wears off, I lose interest. Am I doomed to a shallow life with no real partner?
Tue Feb 14 11:35:37 PST 2006 Great Scott- audience) That’s the honeymoon stage. We ALL love that stage. That’s when you get the best sex, interest, communication, etc. But realistically, the honeymoon stage wears off and you have to be willing to accept that a beautiful friendship can form. Actually, the best relationships start as friendships so why not try the next one that way? Friends first instead of passionate giddy lovers.
Tue Feb 14 11:35:47 PST 2006 Bennie- audience) Scott, are there any circumstances you can think of where it’s ok to cheat?
Tue Feb 14 11:37:24 PST 2006 Great Scott- audience) No, never. I remember recently this girl wrote to me about how excited she was cheating on her boyfriend and in the column I called her a slut. That went over really well with a couple readers! So, my answer is NO never. Why not break up, have a clear conscience and live your life honestly?
Tue Feb 14 11:37:28 PST 2006 robert1714- audience) I know it’s late, but how much money should I spend for a Valentine’s Day present? I’m taking my girl out for dinner tonight in LoDo, and we’ve been together for four dates. I like her, she likes me.
Tue Feb 14 11:39:31 PST 2006 Great Scott- audience) It’s not about spending. That’s what the industry tries to make it about: spend spend spend! Whatever. Dinner is perfect and romantic actually. Women love romance so be sure to say some kind words to her about how you feel about your relationship with her. That can lead to a hot night for you!
Tue Feb 14 11:39:40 PST 2006 Joanie- audience) What does “LOVE” mean to you?
Tue Feb 14 11:41:51 PST 2006 Great Scott- audience) Love is a deep feeling of affection and attraction you feel for someone that makes you care for them, what they think, what they do, where they are, etc. It’s passionate and therefore sometimes painful. No doubt about it, love hurts sometimes but the good outweighs the bad definitely.
Tue Feb 14 11:41:56 PST 2006 gbear- audience) I saw an article that office romances are up. Isn’t it a bad idea to mess around with someone you work with?
Tue Feb 14 11:43:38 PST 2006 Great Scott- audience) No, not necessarily but know that some employers have policies forbidding it, in which case if you still choose to do it, you’ll have to keep it on the down low. The only time an office romance – just like any other romance – is bad is when it’s over. 🙁
Tue Feb 14 11:43:44 PST 2006 Mrs. Jones- audience) What are you doing for Valentine’s Day, Scott?
Tue Feb 14 11:45:01 PST 2006 Great Scott- audience) Well today I’m spending it with you Mrs. Jones! Tonight? Not sure yet. I’m supposed to be in NY but canceled at the last minute because of the snow.
Tue Feb 14 11:45:29 PST 2006 DPO moderator- audience) Okay folks. We’ve got one last question … thanks to all who participated. Look for the transcript on denverpost.com shortly …
Tue Feb 14 11:45:33 PST 2006 lolita- audience) Scott, what can I do to help a friend who is just so wrapped up in the fact she isn’t dating anybody? She is starting to get me down.
Tue Feb 14 11:47:17 PST 2006 Great Scott- audience) How irritating! She needs to get over own self pity. Tell her that because she’s never going to get a date with her self loathing attitude. Seriously, she needs to know that and who better to tell her than you, her friend. Lucky you!
Tue Feb 14 11:47:27 PST 2006 DPO moderator- audience) Scott, can you answer one more? We want Russ to get his question looked at
Tue Feb 14 11:47:33 PST 2006 Russ- audience) This is the first time several years I’ll be by myself on V-Day. Any advice?
Tue Feb 14 11:47:38 PST 2006 Great Scott- audience) Sure!
Tue Feb 14 11:48:52 PST 2006 Great Scott- audience) Yeah, make the most of it Russ and either find a friend to hang out with or rent some movies and have a couple beers at home. Don’t rule out porn!
Tue Feb 14 11:50:02 PST 2006 Great Scott- audience) This was great! Thank you everyone for your participation and remember on this often times overly-commercialized day we call Valentine?s that whether we?re in a long-term relationship or single and ready to mingle, we can use this day to let someone know how we feel about them. Also, take chances with your heart because if you don?t, someone else will! Also, special thanks go to Gil Asakawa, executive producer for creating the column and Rebecca Risch, executive producer and Howard Saltz, associate editor of DenverPost.com for their undying support. Without all of them, there would be no Great Scott! Thanks again. This was fun. Let?s do it again. XO, Scott
Tue Feb 14 11:50:41 PST 2006 DPO moderator- audience) Have a fun, romantic, sexy V Day all! Be sure to read Scott’s daily column Monday – Friday at www.denverpost.com/greatscott.