Although the 1956 Charlton Heston version of “The Ten Commandments” remains one of Hollywood’s greatest epics, ABC thinks we’re ripe for an update.
The network is heavily invested (to the tune of $20 million) in a new four-hour Moses miniseries also called “The Ten Commandments.”
This week, the new miniseries runs Monday and Tuesday at 8 p.m. on KMGH-Channel 7, followed by the classic on Saturday at 6 p.m. That’s a whopping 20 commandments in the space of six days on a single network. On the seventh, ABC rested.
Verily, here are the 10 Commandments for every self-important television miniseries.
I. Cue the digitally enhanced extras. In the age of digital video, it’s not only possible to part the Red Sea without getting wet, it’s easy to depict miles and miles of extras, an entire slave people, without breaking the budget. The visuals will be so good, viewers will covet their neighbor’s high-definition flat-screen TV.
II. Take advantage of the climate. This is 13th-century B.C. Egypt, people. Hot, hot, hot. That means lots of sweat and skin. And tons of extra eyeliner to make the the lavish royal Egyptian household look lush.
III. Halmi Knows Best. Sure, Cecil B. DeMille was a swell storyteller – hey, he had great source material – but to update the classic ABC has contracted the masters of epic miniseries, Robert Halmi Sr. and Robert Halmi Jr. as co-executive producers. The CGI (computer-generated images) effects they bring to the 10 plagues will make the original version look like papier maché. Here you’ll feel the sand in your sandals.
IV. Atmospherics count. So what if Scotsman Dougray Scott (NBC’s faltering “Heist”) lacks the profile and musculature of a young Chuck Heston for the camera to admire? Surrounded by a dark-haired, olive-skinned, Mediterranean-looking supporting cast, he makes a fitting Moses in this new version. And he doesn’t sound like he’s gargling peat, a la Craig Ferguson or Groundskeeper Willie.
V. Stars make miniseries seem more important. Yes, that’s Sayid (Naveen Andrews) from “Lost” playing Menerith. Along with Scott, the cast includes Omar Sharif (“Doctor Zhivago,” “Lawrence of Arabia”) as Jethro, Linus Roache (“The Chronicles of Riddick”) as Aaron, Mia Maestro (“Alias”) as Zipporah and Padma Lakshmi (the BBC series “Sharpe’s Challenge”) as Princess Bithia.
VI. Promotion matters. Thou shalt not forget to remind the audience that this is “the greatest story ever told,” whether the original or a remake.
VII. Blood and gore are more likely to pass muster with the FCC when in the service of a Bible story. While the tale itself is suitable for kids, the battle scenes here are too grisly for youngsters.
VIII. The old-fashioned “Voice of God” is out on TV, except here. Still, the narrator voice-over ought to be distinct from the Voice of God voice-over. In the 2006 remake, they’re too similar and neither voice belongs to James Earl Jones. (Trivia note: In the 1956 film, DeMille – who also directed a 1923 silent version – served as narrator. Heston later claimed he provided the Voice of God, though that is in dispute.)
IX. Adultery, while carved in stone on the list of no-nos, does make for good television. A roll in the sand proves cinematic, and all that sand’s got to be good for something.
X. It is written: Pomposity in the pursuit of a period piece is no sin. Stilted dialogue, somewhere between Shakespearean and biblical, meant to capture a sort of ancient Israeli-speak? Bring it on.
TV critic Joanne Ostrow can be reached at 303-820-1830 or jostrow@denverpost.com.
Moses, then and now
Charlton Heston remains cinema’s most memorable Moses in the 1956 kitsch masterwork “The Ten Commandments,” above. In ABC’s new version – let’s call him Moses 2.0 – Dougray Scott (from NBC’s “Heist,” below) plays the Israelites’ leader. He’s a Scotsman who offers a downbeat, repressed hero. He can’t hold a staff to Heston.
Here are the details on the new and the old:
NEW: This new miniseries runs Monday and Tuesday at 8 p.m. on KMGH-Channel 7.
OLD: The Heston version is Saturday at 6 p.m. on Channel 7.
