People say the darndest things about their bosses.
“My bad boss … proceeded to ask me if I would supply her with some of my urine because she … was called in for a random test. … To persuade me, she offered to babysit my 3-year-old daughter for free. As if I would allow a drug addict to babysit my child!”
If you think Miranda Priestly in the film “The Devil Wears Prada” is a scary boss, check out Working America’s My Bad Boss Contest. The group, affiliated with the AFL-CIO, is collecting anonymous workplace horror stories at its website, www.workingamerica.org/badboss.
“If you’ve had a job, chances are good that you’ve had a bad boss,” said executive director Karen Nussbaum.
Forced overtime, canceled vacations, and reprimands for taking needed sick leave are just the beginning of some bosses’ insensitivities.
“My boss knowingly hired my stalker,” claims the headline on one entry.
Then there’s “Boss cries poverty, drops our health coverage, goes on shopping spree”; “MBA = Most Belligerent Attitude”; “The story of Sir-Lunch-A-Lot”; “Sicko in charge”; and “Satan worships my boss.”
Contestants tell stories that are hard to believe yet sound impossible to make up:
“My boss told me that since I like skulls and dress gothic that I am a witch. … My father had a heart attack and I had to rush to the hospital. … My boss called me and left a message where she said, ‘Why don’t you just cast a spell on your dad and get back to work?”‘
“She said, ‘Well, I feel like such a b!#@! saying this, but we have a huge quota this year, and I just don’t see how you can have cancer AND make your number, so I think you had better find another job.”‘
“Day two (on the job): I walk in to find (the boss) crying her eyes out. A relative had died. She handed me a slip of paper with a name and birthday – nothing else – and said, ‘I’m too distraught to figure this out, please plan his funeral.”‘
“He used to eat a big, greasy Egg McMuffin every morning, then throw the wrapper in my trash can so it wouldn’t stink up his office. I got to smell it all day.”
“She slammed her fist against the wall right next to me. When she removed her fist, there was a dead cockroach embedded in the wall. She proceeded to put a frame around it and scrawled ‘Dead Bug’ underneath it. I was actually afraid to quit!”
“I very nicely asked him if there was anything he needed from the store. He starts digging in his pocket for money and says, ‘Yes! Could you get me – not the small size, but the big size – box of Preparation H wipes?’ I just stood there dumbfounded as he stuffed a pile of sweaty bills into my hand.”
Bad bosses like these have inspired a genre of self-help books with titles such as “Was Your Boss Raised by Wolves?” “How to Work for an Idiot” and “Working With You Is Killing Me.”
Gini Graham Scott, author of “A Survival Guide for Working With Bad Bosses,” says the best strategy is to quit. Too often, a bad boss can’t be defeated because he or she owns the company or is somehow considered an irreplaceable genius.
Theresa Szczurek, a Boulder-based business consultant and the author of “Pursuit of Passionate Purpose,” says sometimes employees can band together and overcome a bad boss, either by direct confrontation or by going to the boss’ boss.
“If a boss is being bad to you, most likely you’re not alone,” Szczurek said.
Nussbaum said she hopes the contest will inspire employees. “Bad bosses don’t help the employees, the business or society,” Nussbaum said. “It’s good to get this out in the open.”
The contest runs through August. The first finalist, announced Wednesday, worked in a psych hospital in Michigan. When she tried to get financial aid for a patient, administrators inexplicably discharged him. The patient shot himself.
“I couldn’t quit crying when I heard and took the rest of the day off. My boss complained. … He said, ‘I don’t know why she had to take the day off. People commit suicide every day.’ I no longer work there. I’m in therapy now.”
Tell me your bad boss/employee stories at denverpostbloghouse.com/lewis.
Al Lewis’ column appears Sundays, Tuesdays and Fridays. E-mail: alewis@denverpost.com.
