Augusta, Ga.
Tiger, period
Now that I’ve got your full attention, let’s talk about Lucas Glover.
Let’s don’t.
If Lucas Glover, Luke Donald and Shingo Katayama are vying for the championship of the Masters on Sunday, Americans en masse will attend Mass, go on an Easter egg hunt, eat chocolate bunnies, slice a ham or take an afternoon nap.
Admit it, Easter peeps: You dearly crave Tiger and Phil traipsing up hill and down dell, around the turn and into Amen Corner, from pines to sand, through thick grass and thin lies, hands-in-gloves, to the 18th green together and tied, closer than Chimera’s two heads. Dueling green jackets (six), Tiger and Phil.
Or Tiger and Vijay.
Or Tiger and Ernie.
Or, yum, Tiger and Sergio.
Or Tiger and Ben C. (Crane, Crenshaw or Curtis).
Or Tiger and anybody.
In Africa, take the lion, and give the points. In Augusta, take Tiger against the field.
In 46 rounds at Augusta National, Tiger has averaged 70.85 strokes. Jack Nicklaus’ average was 71.98, Ben Hogan’s 72.38.
The all-boys club keeps trying to Tiger-proof Augusta National so it won’t play like The Poughkeepsie Pitch ‘n’ Putt. They moved the first tee all the way back to the fireplace in Butler Cabin. The 11th hole now is the length of a runway for a 747. The par-5 No. 8 used to be driver, iron, but it’s become driver, ICBM launcher.
But they can push all the tees back to South Carolina, and Tiger will pull out a wedge for his second shot.
You’re away, world.
Tiger won his first Masters 10 years ago and has added three more. Guess whose turn it is again?
Tired of reading about Tiger? So you’d rather I write about Lucas Glover? He and about 80 others, out of 97 players, have as much chance of finishing first as Augusta’s own, the late James Brown, does. Most aren’t worth a quick Google.
Phil Mickelson has won two of the past three Masters – guess who won the one between – and has been the most prominent challenger to Tiger over the years. But Phil said a few weeks ago, and reiterated this week, that if he has “a great rest of my career, and I go out and win 20 more tournaments and seven more majors to get to 50 wins and 10 majors, which would be an awesome career, I still won’t get to where he (Tiger) is at today. So I don’t try to compare myself against him.”
Amen.
Ernie Els surrendered a long time ago. Sergio is just spit. Vijay tends to win when Tiger isn’t around, and there’s your basic Wetterich and Baddeley, who are left wet and bad.
It has been underplayed that Tiger is on target for another Tiger Slam. That’s the fact, Jack. Tiger won the British Open and the PGA Championship in 2006. In fact, he could accomplish the unaccomplished Grander (four professional majors in one year) Slam. Tiger has been doing fine, thank you, this year, with two victories in five tournaments.
About the only person with a legitimate chance to stop Tiger this year might be his and wife Elin’s baby, due in July.
(Just imagine, in 20 years, a Scarlett Johansson with a silky-smooth backswing and a 1 handicap.)
One of my most memorable moments in sports hacking occurred when I stood with several African-American waiters on the balcony of the clubhouse in 1997 as 21-year-old Tiger strolled up the 18th fairway with his first Masters easily in his clutches and a throng in his wake. It was a coronation parade long anticipated by those who had to come in the back door at the august club.
“My whole life has changed (since 1997), and it’s been a pretty dynamic change, the entire process the last 10 years,” Tiger said Tuesday.
The year before, when Tiger was an amateur, he played a practice round here with Nicklaus and Arnold Palmer, and Nicklaus said afterward: “Arnie and I agreed that the kid will win more Masters than the two of us combined.” Nicklaus had six, Palmer four.
This will be Tiger’s fifth. I’ll give you everybody else in the tournament and two a side.
The question about an athlete I’m most often asked is: “What’s Tiger really like? Is he a good guy?”
I’ve been alone with Tiger a few times – while he was fishing from a river bank in Ireland, as we shared drinks in a Denver den and watched an NBA playoff game, on a sidewalk in New York City, on a practice tee at a youth golf clinic and behind a trailer at St. Andrews.
Unlike some other professionals, Tiger is exactly who you think he is. He is a good guy.
And the greatest golfer since the men who carved out Augusta National and carved up the Masters – Bobby Jones and Nicklaus. Tiger Woods is the modern-day master.
Tiger, exclamation point.
Staff writer Woody Paige can be reached at 303-954-1095 or wpaige@denverpost.com.
