Dear Amy: I’ve developed a little crush on a guy I see from time to time. He’s from the South, and I’ve misread the often charming, flirtatious nature of Southern boys as interest before.
On New Year’s Eve, he kissed me at midnight. It was a good kiss. At a cocktail party at the end of February, he greeted me warmly and watched me dance in an intense way.
Then, just a week ago, we ran into each other at a karaoke bar. He kissed my hand twice in a very charming way, and hung out with me and my friends.
The consensus was that he was interested. So I sent him an e-mail saying that I was happy to have run into him and hoped that I wasn’t too loud and goofy.
He responded with a message saying that he slept off the booze in his car and that the bar where we met was a great dive bar.
Given his response, my inclination is to write his behavior off as drunken, Southern-boy behavior toward an attractive girl.
I realize also that he might not have seen my message as expressing interest — guys can be clueless. My inclination is definitely to play it cool but show interest the next time I see him. Any ideas? — Jacki
Dear Jacki: I have two questions for you.
Do you really want to be with someone who has to sleep off his good time in his car? Do you want to be with someone whom you believe might be “clueless”? I disagree that guys are clueless, by the way. When they’re not drunk and disorderly, they tend to know what they are doing.
If this guy expresses interest in you when he — and you — are both sober, then you’re onto something.
Dear Amy: My daughter is 20 and a college sophomore. The mother of her old high school friend is regularly checking texts, instant messages and MySpace communications between her daughter and friends. I am randomly presented with “evidence” of their behavior.
I am familiar with these types of communication, as I use them myself. I think it would be difficult to actually track what’s going on between kids because of the way this information is used and forwarded.
Given that my daughter has never given me a reason not to trust her, what should I do when confronted by another parent who seems to be unable to let the young adults live their lives? I also wonder where to draw the line. — MH in Dallas
Dear MH: Draw the line at those communications that are publicly available for all the world to see. If your daughter’s MySpace page is populated with bikini poses and drunken boasts, then she needs to know that these online statements can dog her into the future.
Otherwise, tell this other mother that the communication between these young people bores you to sobs and you’d rather not see it.
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