Dear Amy: My granddaughter was invited to a high school senior prom a couple of months ago.
She is 16 years old and in the same high school as the person who invited her.
My granddaughter went out and purchased a beautiful dress. The day of the prom, she got her hair done, had her nails and makeup done, and basically went the “whole nine yards.” The heartless creep who was supposed to take her called her up two hours before he was supposed to pick her up and said he wouldn’t be taking her. He said he had decided to take someone else. Needless to say, she was devastated.
How could anyone be so cruel as to pull a stunt like that? — Wounded
Dear Wounded: First, a word about high school heartless creeps. In the end, they end up getting their own treatment thrown right back at them. You should encourage your granddaughter to take a very long view on this. This is a perspective that grandparents can offer, and one that teenagers need.
You should rent the movie “Never Been Kissed” and watch it with your granddaughter. In this charming movie, a similar event happens, but what the movie offers is a version of what can happen next. Your granddaughter should be encouraged to always behave ethically and with integrity, regardless of the heartless creeps she may encounter.
Your granddaughter’s parents should contact the boy’s parents. She is owed an apology, and the right thing for the boy’s parents to do would be to compensate her for her expenses.
Dear Amy: I must respectfully take exception to your stand on “giving away” daughters at a wedding. I am a minister with four daughters. My eldest expressed it best when discussing both “giving away” and “officiating” at her wedding. She said: “Dad, I am not chattel or cattle. Please just ‘present’ me, and as far as ‘officiating,’ I just want you to be ‘Dad’ that day.”
The issue is not ownership of daughters on the part of a parent, but rather love, honor and respect on the part of a daughter. — Proud Dad
Dear Dad: You raised a very wise daughter. I agree with her (and you) that there is a world of difference between “giving away” and “presenting.”
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