Dear Amy: I was hoping you could put something in your column about office attire.
I work for a major accounting firm, and the new college kids coming in need to go to a class to learn what “office casual” really means.
It is disgusting in here — all boobs and butts. The young women wear skintight clothes, low-cut blouses (and I mean low-cut), low-riding pants, with their butts showing, and see-through blouses and dresses without the proper undergarments.
One dress was so sheer, I could see the moles on this woman’s skin. She had on thong underwear and a dress that had the consistency of a nylon nightgown. And let’s just not even go into the nasty tattoos.
If I was an employer and someone came to an interview dressed like some of these kids, they would never get hired. — Tired of the B and B’s
Dear Tired: We’re all just a little tired of the current skintight fashions, but the workplace is the ideal environment to educate young people about a lot of things — such as showing up to work on time, demonstrating a commitment to one’s job and not text-messaging a friend during a staff meeting.
These things take time, however, along with careful and respectful mentoring.
It would be a service to your young colleagues if a supervisor sat down with them and reviewed the professional expectations.
Dear Amy: My husband and I have been good friends with a couple whom we’ve known for many years. I’m starting to get concerned with my husband’s need to contact the wife of this couple. He will find any excuse to call, and when I question this he gets defensive and says he just wants to see how they are, but he seldom speaks to the husband.
When she calls us and my husband picks up, she never asks for me and is happy talking only with him. When I ask who it is and want to have a word, I have to pry the phone from him or have a three-way conversation with the two of them.
I’m sure he calls her from work and when I’m not home. He has also told her personal things that I would never have disclosed to her.
I haven’t thought anything of this in the past, but now it’s starting to bother me.
Am I overreacting? — Concerned
Dear Concerned: This is a matter best handled by having a challenging conversation — not confrontation — with both parties.
You need to tell your husband that this makes you uncomfortable and ask him what changes he could make to ease your mind.
You should also talk to your friend. Tell her that you know she and your husband are friends, but that the relationship is starting to seem exclusive and you feel cut out.
Dear Amy: I have a comment on the issue of health-care providers addressing patients by their first name.
I am a 60-something dentist, and in my office we deal with the question at the first appointment. Our patient registration form has a space that says, “I prefer to be called ——.” Incidentally, for patients who are 21 or older, I always introduce myself by first and last name, not as “Doctor.” — Informal “Doc”
Dear Doc: I understand that interpretation of HIPAA laws concerning patients’ privacy have some medical practices resorting to using first names only, but it seems to me that in the privacy of the examination room, patients should be addressed as they wish to be addressed.
I like your practice of asking patients what they prefer and then respecting their wishes.
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