Dear Amy: My son (in his 30s) was diagnosed with leukemia last year.
It was a very long, grueling year, but thankfully he is now in remission and is doing pretty well.
He received a stem-cell transplant from an anonymous donor. All we know of this donor is that he was a young male from a country in Europe.
We will be coming up on the one-year anniversary of the transplant. At that time more information about the donor will be made available to us (providing he agrees, of course).
I don’t know if we will ever get to meet this young man as we cannot afford to go to Europe, and I don’t know if he’ll ever come to the United States.
As you can imagine, to say we’re indebted to and grateful to him is a vast understatement. He literally saved my son’s life. I would very much like to get him a token of our gratitude and appreciation — whether we have the opportunity to meet him or not.
While we can’t afford to go to Europe, I can afford to buy him something nice. But I have absolutely no idea what. While I know we will all write him letters expressing our gratitude, I would love to be able to give him something that will remind him of our thanks for his selfless act. If you have any idea or any suggestions of what might be nice and appropriate, I’d be eternally grateful. — Grateful Mom
Dear Mom: If your donor chooses to be known to you, the best gift you can give him is also the simplest.
Your family members should write him heartfelt letters letting him know what his gift means to your family. Tell him about your son, about his life — his struggles and triumphs — and thank this selfless donor for giving a stranger a chance at life and health. I can think of no other gift that would mean as much.
Your donor might also appreciate a photograph or two of your son with his family gathered around him.
Your family should also consider paying this act of generosity forward, registering to become donors for other people facing similar health challenges.
Send questions via e-mail to askamy@tribune.com or by mail to Ask Amy, Chicago Tribune, TT500, 435 N. Michigan Ave., Chicago, IL 60611.
