Bill Ferguson calls it Arborgate. The owner of the venerable 17th Avenue Grill says the city’s Forestry Division is driving him up a tree over a request to remove the lights that are wrapped around the trees in front of the restaurant during the growing season from March through June each year.
The city sent out notices to 18 businesses in Denver last month telling them to remove the lights for the four-month growth period or face fines up to $1,000.
The thing is, Ferguson first strung the tree lights in 1988 when he opened the eatery, and this is the first time the city has objected. Plus, the annual removal and re-installation of the lights will cost him roughly $2,000.
“We’re sympathetic to the city’s desire to be green and create a beautiful environment, but there needs to be a healthy compromise,” Ferguson said. “I don’t think a good solution will be realized until somebody actually complies and finds out the extent and the expense. We’re going to be the guinea pig, I know it.”
Jill McGranahan, spokeswoman for Denver’s Parks and Recreation Department, says that in 1988 when the lights were installed, the trees were less mature.
“As the tree is growing, compression is taking place,” McGranahan said. “Maybe 10 years ago, it wasn’t an issue, but it’s become more constraining to the growth of the tree. Our goal is not to cite (businesses), but to maintain the health of these trees. If the lights kill the tree, who’s liable for the cost of the tree?”
For Ferguson’s part, he says he’s not trying to be difficult, he just thinks there has to be a solution that won’t put such a financial burden on small businesses.
“I’m not saying no; I think it’s a great idea, but this needs to be handled in a little more businesslike manner,” he said.
Vesta is besta.
Vesta Dipping Grill, the tres hip eatery at 1822 Blake St., wants you and your co-workers to get hep with a free happy hour in June.
Vesta is giving away 25 free happy hours (up to $500) with food and Colorado spirits, wine and beer to businesses that just need a break.
Go to and fill out the e-form explaining why your office deserves a free happy hour.
Laugh lift.
We all know that the economy is no laughing matter. Layoffs, furloughs, disappearing 401(k)s — not exactly knee-slappers.
But Comedy Works wants to lighten your load with some free laughs. Anyone who has lost a job in recent months can e-mail lostmyjob@comedyworks.com and get two free tickets to a show at the LoDo or Tech Center location.
Hardbodies scores.
Team Hardbodies, a fearsome foursome from Denver’s Hardbodies Striptease, beat out 25 other teams to win the Playboy Scramble golf tournament last month in Houston with a total gross score of 18 under.
Next stop: the finals in Los Angeles in October, along with two parties in the infamous Playboy mansion and a free trip to Las Vegas.
“We had a blast and cannot wait for the finals,” said Hardbodies president Steve Lower. “It will be my fifth trip to the mansion, but it never gets old.”
Eavesdropping on a nonmeat- eater talking to a woman: “I still don’t feel that great.”
“What have you got?”
“Vegetarian flu.”
Penny Parker’s column appears Tuesday, Thursday, Friday and Sunday. Listen to her on the Caplis and Silverman radio show between 4 and 5 p.m. Fridays on KHOW-AM (630). Call her at 303-954-5224 or e-mail pparker@denverpost.com.
