Dear Amy:I gave a friend of my son’s a ride home in my car. The boy slammed my back door really hard. He was being a typical 14-year-old and acting silly.Later that day, I realized that the electric window on that side of the car wasn’t working properly. I took the car to the dealership and got it fixed. The bill was nearly $600! Because it was so much money, I thought the boy’s parents should pay for it, or at least pay for half.
When I told them about it, they were skeptical that their son broke it. I even gave them the receipt. Who do you think was responsible for paying for the broken window? — Sadder But Wiser
Dear Sadder: You don’t say whether you asked the dealership the cause of the broken window mechanism. If the mechanic told you, “This door has been slammed too hard, and it has broken the window,” then you’d have evidence to take to the parents. As it is, this is your car, and you are responsible for maintaining and repairing it.
The teachable moment is for your son and his friend. The message should be, “I know you were fooling around, but cars are expensive, and I believe this created a problem. I hope you’ll be aware of it and never do it again.”
Dear Amy: I just finished an internship with a girl I was attracted to at first sight.
During the time we spent together at work, we connected in a casual, flirty way. We have seem to have similar personalities.
The relationship was doomed from the start, I guess. We go to school on opposite coasts, and she has a steady boyfriend.
I know that as time passes, I will think about her less and less, or, on the flip side, we may stand a chance of being together in the long run.
Should I tell her how I really feel about her while the summer memories are still fresh? And if not now, should I ever tell her? — Wannabe Boyfriend
Dear Wannabe: While the memories of your summer are still fresh, you might e-mail her, stating how getting to know her made your summer memorable. Share a common memory. Say you’ll keep in touch. If she is romantically interested in you, she’ll let you know.
Dear Amy: “Worried Friend” was concerned that a friend’s recent marriage was doomed to fail and wanted to intervene. Your answer was absolutely right.
My wife and I decided to marry within a month of meeting. We got married seven months after we met. We were married for 16 glorious years and would have been married many more if she hadn’t died far too young.
Life is uncertain enough without making assumptions about what can or cannot work out. — Been There
Dear Been there: Your experience shows that unless there are glaring or obvious reasons to object to a person’s marriage, a friend should be open and supportive.
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