It’s easy to see why Arizona is attempting to address the immigration problem in their state on their own. I guess people will have to “show us your papers” once they are deemed sufficiently non-native looking, but which alien heritage are they attempting to identify and how will officers determine that?
I work at a typical office/shop operation and as part of our many, varied, and highly responsible duties I answer the phone along with “Bill” (not his real name, his real name is “Bob”) who sits in the cubicle next to me. A lady called the other day and couldn’t remember the person she talked to but in fumbling around for a description she asked for the guy with the “accent.”
That didn’t help me any. I asked if it was a Southern accent or Argentinean accent or what kind of accent she was referring to, in a lighthearted teasing kind of way. She hemmed and hawed, whatever that means, for a time and then said , “you know , a … Spanish accent.”
I sit right next to Bob, or uh “Bill,” and have for many months now and have to admit I never noticed that he has any accent. I guess there are some words that he says in a slightly Spanish way, if you can call it Spanish, but then there are many Spanish type words that he pronounces in a decidedly American way. There are several guys in our shop that pronounce Spanish words in an American way and some words that I’m sure none of us are pronouncing correctly.
There’s even a guy named “Tom” (which may or may not be his real name) that kind of speaks in a, well, slightly Amish way. Since there is no country called Amishia I guess he wouldn’t have to show his papers unless he was suspiciously found shopping in a Buckle or Gap store with his signature suspenders.
I had to laugh a little at myself, when we figured out who she was calling for because it just hadn’t occurred to me that he had an accent. I would imagine that, to many officers, hearing an accent might be kind of a subjective thing as well. I would hope though that most could discern a Spanish accent when they heard it since we don’t want a lot of toreadors wandering our streets, harassing our bull population.
I guess one way to seek out people, for example only, of Spanish descent, an officer could say a really funny joke in Spanish and take a hard look at anyone in the group who is laughing hysterically.
Looking at how someone dresses isn’t a very good way to separate legal from illegal aliens either, I wouldn’t think. The way kids are today, whenever a minority group begins to exhibit any particular “fashion” it immediately becomes all the rage and soon all the kids are doing it.
The same goes with what someone drives. I think the spinning hub caps, Landau roofs, rubber bull testicles, and bouncing mechanisms are pretty well distributed throughout the population, including both legal and illegal populations. I guess with 30 million illegal aliens in the country, accents, fashions, and styles might be questionable ways of determining who has to “show us your papers.”
I also have to wonder if, to some people, I have an accent. My Mom was half “Latin.” I don’t really know how Latin became Latino or any number of other variations of that word which means coming from California but apparently I’m of Spanish decent too. I wonder if I need to find out where to get my papers.
Mike Clow lives in Colorado Springs. EDITOR’S NOTE: This is an online-only column and has not been edited.
