Hurt people hurt others. I heard someone say this the other day and found it profound. In that same discourse, another party suggested also that “healed people heal others.” So which are you?
Chances are we are all in a similar place-somewhere floating between hurt and healed, depending on the events of the day, our emotional state and the circumstances of a particular event. Much as I would like to think I float closer to “healed,” than “hurt,” there are times that – whether I’m conscious of it or not – I affect others in a not-so-positive manner.
But more than whether we “hurt,” or “heal” in the moment, I think a bigger test of character is how we deal with each situation and how we handle our effect not only on others, but ultimately ourselves. Think about it, when you’ve done or said something positive for someone without expectation of reciprocity, you’ve made a deposit into the bank of universal love. Ever done something in passing and years later someone offers you kindness so overwhelming that you’re amazed by the power of human compassion? Perhaps it’s your love deposits hitting you like a winning lottery ticket in a time of great need. You can’t believe your good fortune and hopefully you’re grateful for the windfall.
So go the withdrawals. We’ve each also experienced times where, though we think we’re “doing everything right,” we’re slapped with a series of “non-sufficient-funds” notices and subsequent fees in the form of negative experiences. This may sound all too destiny-driven or karma-laden, but I do believe our energy affects others in ways we may never know or understand, and that when we least expect it – that same energy comes back like a cosmic boomerang and affects us exponentially.
After all, we’re human, and this journey of life truly is a series of lessons, strung together like a well-thought-out lesson plan, with the ultimate goal of having us graduate to the next level. And just like school, how much we gain from each lesson depends on the effort we put forth and the awareness used during class. Are you listening? More importantly, with each slap on the wrist or positive experience are you feeling the love or the “tough love,” as it may be?
Sometimes we put so much effort into wondering how the other person feels, how they may react, what they mean by something, that we forget to ask, “how do I feel?” In the end, the situation in question may be a lesson for you, rather than the other party or parties. If we do a gut check and ensure that, indeed, we are treating others as we’d want to be treated… That we are putting out energies we wouldn’t mind returning to us… Or that our intentions are to uplift rather than to tear down, then we can rest assured that – whether done “correctly” or not, our actions are coming from the right place, a place of unconditional love and thus healing. But if you take a second to assess and realize said actions may be more lashing out, projecting or even experiencing emotion like envy or jealousy, then a realignment of position may be in order.
So where on the continuum do you sit at this moment – closer to hurting or healing? A quick assessment may help someone you’re dealing with today as well as, dictate a love deposit or withdrawal that tremendously will affect your future.
Doni Luckutt is a lifestyle expert who believes by enhancing interpersonal connection, we can stop simply living, and become Simply Alive! If you have a suggestion on what brings you to life, connect with her on Twitter @SimplyAlive, via email Doni@SimplyAliveWorld.com or on her blog: www.SimplyAliveWorld.com/Blog.
