For Brandon Stokley the son, the hardest part was watching his father lose his mind to the plague of Alzheimer’s disease.
For Brandon Stokley the father, the hardest part was explaining it to his oldest son, Cameron, as he passes down the love of football his father passed down to him.
“I tried to the best way I could,” the veteran Broncos receiver said last week. “But it’s tough explaining to a 6-year-old that their grandfather, he can’t talk and he’s not coming back. That was probably the toughest part.”
His eyes reddened as he looked out at Dove Valley’s manicured practice fields, where he had just hung out with his son for nearly half an hour after a Broncos workout. Somewhere behind those eyes was the memory of a scrawny teenage version of himself, a high school football player only a father could love.
“I grew up around football,” he said. “Him being coach and me being coach’s kid, that’s all I did. During the summers, I was at two-a-days. I went on road trips with him in high school and middle school. Without that experience and without being around it all the time, I don’t think my passion for the game, my love for the game would be what it is today.”
Nelson Stokley was a former Louisiana State University quarterback and longtime coach at a school now known as the University of Louisiana at Lafayette. When his son was there, it was known as the University of Southwestern Louisiana. The elder Stokley died June 5 from complications of Alzheimer’s at 66. His death was mourned by former Ragin’ Cajuns across the country.
“I was lucky enough to see him at his most gratifying time . . . when he got to see his son play,” veteran NFL quarterback Jake Delhomme told The Daily Advertiser of Lafayette the day Nelson Stokley died. “That was a special time.”
At 140 pounds, Brandon didn’t generate much interest among college coaches despite leading the state in receptions as a senior at Lafayette’s Ovey Comeaux High School.
“I didn’t really get any offers,” Stokley recalled. “I wasn’t the biggest guy and I wasn’t the fastest guy, but I was a pretty quick guy. I just didn’t have many options.
“If I wanted to play football, it was to play for my father. So that’s where I went. And it worked out great. I’m so glad I did. It was the best five years of my life, being able to play for him and see him every day, because as a coach’s kid, your dad’s gone a lot. That’s just the reality of the business. So to be able to be there for five years and to see him as much as I did was awesome.”
The Alzheimer’s diagnosis came about four years ago.
“He’d been hanging in there. Last offseason we were able to play golf and he was still doing great. Even up till Christmas he was doing great. And then, just after Christmas, it took a really bad turn and just progressively got worse and worse. I think it was a blessing there at the end, it just went quickly. Because they get in a state where they don’t recognize anybody, and I know he wouldn’t want to live like that.”
By the end, Nelson Stokley did not recognize his own son.
“It’s just so tough to watch people go through that, to lose their mind,” said the son, now a spokesman for the Alzheimer’s Association. “I can’t think of anything worse.”
He is fully aware that his own history of concussions puts him at risk for the Alzheimer’s-like symptoms of dementia found in increasing numbers of retired players.
“You think about it, but I’ve been tested,” Stokley said. “I got a lot of tests done last year. There’s only so much you can do. This is my job. Right now I’m fine. I can’t say that I’ll be fine in 10 years, but if I quit football now, it might still be the same. You just never know. That’s the thing with the brain, you can’t really tell unless you go in there and open it up.”
The Broncos drafted a pair of receivers this year, increasing the numbers crunch at Stokley’s position. At 34, he’s the old man of the crew. His competitors have all the athletic advantages, but then, his competitors almost always do.
“They’re a lot bigger, they might be a lot faster, but that’s all right,” he said. “I’m going to compete hard. At the end, whatever happens happens, but I’m just going to try to have fun and compete.”
Already, the drafted receivers have suffered injuries in camp. The old man is still around. Even as he buried his father and lifelong coach, he never thought about hanging it up.
“I know that my Dad wouldn’t have wanted that,” he said. “It was a tough time, but this is work and you’ve got to get back to work and you’ve got to get back to life. You kind of feel like you’re honoring him out here by just going out and playing hard and working hard. So that’s what I’m doing.”
Dave Krieger: 303-954-5297, dkrieger@denverpost.com or
