Getting your player ready...
Dear J.T. & Dale: I need advice. I attended college for two years but was forced to withdraw because I was no longer able to afford tuition. Unfortunately, my mother was also diagnosed with a brain tumor at the end of last year, so I came home to take care of her. I have not been able to find any kind of employment. I go job-searching every day and have had a few interviews, but no jobs. – Josh
J.T.: I’m so sorry to hear about your mother. It’s hard to look for work with so much going on in your personal life, and perhaps your ability to market yourself has been compromised – understandably so! As hard as it is, you need to put your personal issues out of your mind so you can talk to employers about the contribution you can make.
DALE: Your situation is a heartbreaking one. That’s why I hope you don’t tell it in interviews. Even if interviewers are personally sympathetic, they’ll worry that you’ll be distracted or will need time off to care for your mother, or will be depressing to be around. Unfair? Yes, horribly unfair. However, that ugly reality makes a crucial point about the underlying dynamic of job-searching. As children, we learn to ask the adults for help. So it’s natural, as we grow up and enter the job market, to ask “the adults” (those in positions of authority) for help. You do that when you explain why you need the job/money. But that’s the worst approach. Employers are hiring because THEY need help. You have to offer help, not request it.
J.T.: Here’s how you get to that point: Think about tasks you’ve undertaken that you found satisfying. Then, think about jobs that would let you do more of those tasks. Now you can go to employers and say, “I want to work for you because I love solving the kinds of problems your company faces.” Because you’re talking about what you love doing, you’ll find it easy to talk about your strengths with enthusiasm.
Dear J.T. & Dale: Having been a stay-at-home mom for 15 years, it’s now time for me to re-enter the work force. I’ve made attempts to find a career-type position, but I am not even sure what type of career I want. I have a bachelor of science in chemistry and worked in a few labs before I had kids, and while I enjoyed this, I could see myself being happy in another field. My lack of current work experience seems to leave me underqualified for most positions, while my degree makes me overqualified for the rest. Any suggestions? – Barb
DALE: First, forget about the whole “over” and “under” nonsense. These are not the real issue for employers, just easy excuses for dismissing your application. What’s the real issue? Nobody wants to hire someone who doesn’t know what she wants to do.
J.T.: Finding out what you want to do can be an energizing and fulfilling “working education.” Your learning curve will be steep if you seek a job that lets you leverage your strengths and build your skill set in something you find interesting and rewarding. So, start with strengths/skills, and you’ll discover that those end up being the true job qualifications.
DALE: If focusing on skills works, great. However, if that leaves you more confused, here is a different approach: Look around at all the people you know, and single out those you most respect. Try to find common denominators in their work/careers. Then, go to those people, tell them that they made your Most Respected list – they’ll be flattered, of course – and ask for advice. What would be an ideal outcome is if one or two of those people could use some part-time help.
