The creep of Black Friday sales into Thanksgiving is creating a lot of debate over how we should spend our time this holiday. What will our children learn from our choices? Will Thanksgiving shopping create more materialistic kids?
It turns out gratitude and materialism don’t mix — it’s really hard to embrace both. Which should we choose? A recent study of high school students ages 14 to 19 found that grateful students were happier, got better grades, had more friends, and felt less envy and depression than their peers, according to lead researcher Jeffrey Froh, an assistant psychology professor at Hofstra University.
In contrast, materialistic kids had lower grade point averages and more envy of others says the report, recently published in the Journal of Happiness Studies. The bottom line: Materialistic youth are languishing while grateful kids are flourishing.
Kids who are thankful for what they have place less importance on material goods — so they’re less likely to judge themselves and others in terms of possessions accumulated. As a result, grateful kids are less envious of others and more likely to share what they have.
Helping our families focus on gratitude this Thanksgiving can actually set the tone for the entire holiday season: Parents with tight holiday budgets may actually save more by simply teaching their kids to want less.
It’s no surprise that our kids are strongly influenced by the choices we make as well as by their perceptions of society. But research confirms anyway that children exposed to materialistic social models are more likely to acquire materialistic values. When those materialistic values become essential to children’s value systems, their personal well-being decreases.
Similarly, gratitude provides the strongest benefits when it’s practiced frequently and becomes an integral part of our personalities. So teaching kids how to count their blessings now can help them reap even more positive benefits as they become adults — including the ability to be resilient in difficult times.
Parents who want grateful children need to practice gratitude, too. So while Black Friday bargains might be seem like a great way to maximize holiday spending, staying at home may save us money and create happier kids too — and that may be the best bargain of all.
Lisa Wirthman is a freelance writer living in Highlands Ranch. Reach her at lisawirthman@yahoo.
