You’ve heard of the “A” Line, but what about the “J” line?
Imagine being escorted from a central location (like Cervantes in Five Points) to the home of the Colorado Rapids over at the soccer field at Dick’s Sporting Goods Park in Commerce City in the “kush” confines of a shuttle just in time to catch Phish their way through the cluster flies of
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Sound good? Lo and behold , the new luxurious shuttle that will schlep Phish fans from Cervantes to Dick’s Sporting Goods Park for the annual Phish Dick’s Labor Day end of summer blowout.
For $40 per day, they will serve as your designated party driver. For a little more, Phishheads get the VIP treatment, complete with complimentary booze, a big TV, leather couches, and even a stash of some not-so-subtly-hinted-at ganja to help you find your inner on your way to see the band on September 2-4.
We’re strictly spit-balling here, but we’re willing to venture that should this sweet ride to Phish’s show in Commerce City catch on, it’ll include a few of the following before long:
A back-mounted vaporizer shaped like Fishman’s vacuum cleaner. Any Phish-head worth their weight in oregano wouldn’t be caught smoking out of a one-hitter. Why back-mounted? For portability. Also, the Ghostbusters tie-in, which is just cheese sprinkles on the chili fries.
A one-million page stat book detailing each of the band’s live shows. (or, alternatively, ) For when you just gotta know how many times lead guitarist Trey Anastasio jammed from “Guyute” into “Divided Sky” with a “Tweezer” teaser between Phish’s two-night stand at Roseland Ballroom in February 1993 and their hiatus show at Coventry in Vermont in 2004 — and quick.
A fountain of The catch: it only works when the bus’ lights go out.
