What do you get when you cram the original Misfits, Nas and a Ferris Wheel into a cattle yard? Denver’s iteration of Riot Fest, a music festival with the programming focus of a in an open-air market.
It sounds like it could never work, but there is beauty in this chaos — beauty in double-fisting corndogs while dabbing to Flatbush Zombies, then using the leftover wooden sticks to air drum along to Bad Religion right after.
If you haven’t been to Riot Fest before, here’s what you should know before you jump off the top rope.
1. , and be realistic. It’s about a five-minute walk between the furthest two stages, not counting the setbacks you might encounter dodging wayward nacho plates. Also, there’s a tendency to over schedule at festivals as packed as this one. If you’re planning on going all day, you should probably come to grips with the fact you aren’t going to be able to catch everything you want to see. Better to make sure you get a good spot for your essentials than to barely make the last song of a bunch of sets you’re lukewarm on.
2. The National Western Complex is your enemy. Spread over two parking lots and a rodeo arena, which will house one of the main stages this year, the grounds are a mixture of pavement, dirt and loose rock that can spell disaster for your ankles and backs, for all you aging punks — especially if you’re in the pit. Switch out those combat boots for hiking boots. Your body will thank you.
3. Wear a bandana. It’s dusty at the National Western Complex and it smells like cows. (Specifically: Cow farts. Literally.)
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4. Bring a lot of cash. As with all festivals, food and drink come at a wallet-shriveling premium. The catch at Riot Fest: You’re dealing with carnival fare — some of most irresistible drunk food in the known universe. (And Riot Fest has some of the best around according to Marc Hobelman, who won Riot Fest tickets at for the second year in a row this week.) Bring both . Also, those carnival rides aren’t cheap, and you better believe you’re gonna wanna ride the Ferris Wheel.
5. Bike there, or split your ride-sharing car of choice as many ways as possible. The National Western Complex is a ways out there, and almost everybody uses Uber/Lyft. Good news for you two-wheelers: The festival has bicycle parking off of Brighton Boulevard and East 46th Avenue. If you do take a ride-sharing car, expect to see a massive price surge as the festival lets out every night. Leave a few minutes before the encore of the last set if you really want to beat the rush.
6. Step off site if you need a break. There are a few worthy spots to refuel nearby. If you’re looking to grab lunch or breakfast before you head in, grab a cinnamon roll at the (1701 38th St). If you’ve got designs on a beer and dinner, check out RiNo’s newly opened (3750 Chestnut Place).
Thanks to Marc Hobelman for his sage Riot Fest advice. If you see at the National Western Complex this weekend, don’t let him anywhere close to your burritos. He’ll eat them in record time.
