Q: Hey Scott,
I have to admit, I’m a little lost, and so I thought I would tap your external third-party mind.
Here is the situation, I got divorced a year ago. At the time, my ex-wife and I just plain weren’t ready for marriage, and I think there were a lot of problems in our relationship (not enough honesty in how we were feeling, and not enough emotional sharing).
I was quite hurt after the divorce, and decided that I had to move on without contact even though it was her wish to remain friends.
Fast forward to today.
I ran into her last weekend. We had the usual small talk, and then went our separate ways. Later, she called and left a message that it was good to see me, that she missed me, and she hoped all was good.
So my question is, what should I do?
My mind tells me to leave it where it is, but my heart tells me to contact her and follow up. My friends tell me that she probably thinks she made a mistake.
But I’m not sure if she is just contacting me for friendship, or if there is more behind it.
Unfortunately (or fortunately, not sure) I have not yet moved on from her. So obviously I still have feelings for her.
Do I take the cautious route, protect my emotions, and leave it as is, or do I take a risk in life and contact her to meet?
Thanks for your help,
– Confused Through Contact
SCOTT: I took a deep breath and tapped my third eye 21 times. At the expense of clogging my pores, I had a revelation.
Return the phone call.
Does your ex-wife feel like she made a mistake and want to be friends? Does she miss you and want to be more than that?
That’s what you need to find out and now’s the time, my friend.
There are a few relationship basics that, when in place, make having a relationship not only possible but actually easy. Timing is right up at the top.
Perhaps your timing wasn’t on your side in the past, (right person, wrong time). Maybe you’re meant to be great friends. Time will tell.
And don’t worry so much about your emotions. You’re still hurt anyway, and perhaps communicating will help bring much needed closure. Take the risk, meet for a drink and a talk and see where life takes you.
Love is the highest highs and the lowest lows but if we don’t take risks, we never get to reap the benefits.
That’s what my third eye tells me, anyway.