Monday May 1
6 p.m. “Jamie’s School Lunch Project”
Chef Jamie Oliver prepares a healthy lunch for schoolchildren. But as soon as the camera is off, they trade it for Twinkies and sugar water. The Learning Channel.
7 p.m. “Monster Garage”
The team turns a DeLorean into a hovercraft. Hovering on a cushion of air sounds a lot like John DeLorean’s business plan. Discovery Channel.
7 p.m. “Prison Break”
Michael learns they might have to launch their escape before the plan is ready. It seems, the guards know about the May Sweeps. Fox.
7 p.m. “Ever After: A Cinderella Story” The abused daughter in a dysfunctional step family is turned into a sex object up by an eccentric woman she doesn’t know and attends a party where she is sexually harassed by an inbred royal with a foot fetish. (1998) ABC Family.
8 p.m. “The Apprentice”
The contestants open a hair salon on Long Island. We’re not sure if Trump is in on the joke. NBC.
8 p.m. Fit TVs Diet Doctor”
A stand-up comedian needs help losing weight. The fat comic career path pioneered by John Belushi and Chris Farley doesn’t come with a good retirement plan. TV.
9 p.m. “CSI: Miami
Detectives investigate two murders aboard a cruise ship, racing to solve the case before another platoon of septuagenarians shuffles by in a sad conga line with their support hose sagging. CBS.
10:35 p.m. “Late Show with David Letterman”
Tom Hanks is publicizing his new “Da Vinci Code,” apologizing to Catholics who might be offended and explaining why it was important enough to put off doing that much-asked-for “Bachelor Party” sequel. CBS.