Dear Amy: I have been married to my husband for 18 years. We have two children. I drove a minivan for 10 years but now have a medium-size station wagon. My husband, after 10 years of driving an old Jeep, finally got the car of his dreams – a big SUV.
I remember having conversations with him about swapping the cars if I needed to, because I sometimes need more space for outings with multiple kids. (I am a Girl Scout leader.) His vehicle will comfortably hold seven adults. Mine holds four adults and two small children (in the third-row fold-up seat). He will not admit to remembering our discussion to swap cars, and he refuses to let me use his SUV.
He’s obsessive about his vehicle. He thinks it’s too big for me to drive. He worries that I will scratch it or get into an accident. I do not feel any of these issues are justified, and I think that he should love me more than he loves his SUV. I have had one accident in 20 years (a fender-bender).
My kids say they get carsick and scrunched up way back in the fold-up seat. My husband’s stubbornness seems downright selfish and immature. This is making me angrier every time he turns me down. What should I do?
– Resentful Wife
Dear Resentful: If your husband had bought a sports car, a sedan or a Vespa scooter for himself, you wouldn’t be tempted to pile the girls into it.
It isn’t kind of your husband to be so stingy about his vehicle, but then, it isn’t kind of you to set this up as a test of his love for you.
The next time you have an outing on your hands that exceeds the available space in your car, you should say to your husband, “Honey, the Girl Scouts need to meet at the corner of Clark and Main for the cookie drive. After you take them there, could you swing by Costco and pick up a gross of goldfish crackers and the family pack of paper towels?”
If he wants to be master and commander of his land yacht, then by all means let him.
…
Dear Amy: I live in L.A.
Why are the women who live in this city gold diggers and wannabe Hollywood superstars? The other day I met a lovely and beautiful woman. She was from a small town in another state.
She had the best, most wholesome attitude and was down to earth. I took her out to dinner, then dancing, and we had a wonderful time.
On Monday, she went back to her home. If I met a blond of that caliber from here in L.A., I would have to be Donald Trump or Tom Cruise! Here in Los Angeles, where can I find a model-type blond who is not poisoned with big-city mentalities?
– In Search of a Goddess
Dear In Search: As long as you continue to look for “model-type blond goddesses,” you’ll get what you get and be very lonely trying.
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