Q: Great Scott – I have recently met a wonderful man and I am enjoying this new, exciting relationship immensely! The issue I am having with him is that he is transferring across the country within the month. We met in February and have been exclusive ever since, spending every spare moment we have with each other. We are in love; I am totally enrolled in having him as a partner and planning a life with him. In fact we have already discussed having children. Last week we scheduled our entire summer together, when he would be here, when I would go there.
So, I guess my question is – do long-distance relationships really work? I have never been in one and I am certainly not excited about it, but if the alternative is not having him in my life, then this is what I am going to do. He says it is only temporary and he seems to have much more confidence in the idea than I do. So, what is the secret to having a successful long-distance romance? How can I make this work?
Thanks.
– Distance sucks
SCOTT: You’re right. Distance sucks, big time! If you read me regularly, you already know that I don’t think that LDR’s work. Here’s why: relationships are a challenge as it is, but throw a grip of mileage in the mix and you’re left with a labor-intensive, frustrating overload.
I’m definitely not saying you should give up. Anything’s possible you can spend long hours on the phone, do the webcam thing and fly to see each other when time permits just be realistic because that’ll get old eventually and you’re going to need a plan to bring you back together.
Enjoy your summer and trust what you have for now. Even he says it’s only temporary, so go with that and you can look forward to more in the future because with good planning and an even better commitment, it CAN work.