Following the November sweeps and looking toward midseason, it’s time to plug holes.
Quick, someone call NBC’s “Dateline” and have them gin up a pile of predator stories.
Substitute a “20/20” for whatever is on the grid. Alert the folks at ABC’s “Primetime” they can rush a five-part
series onto the air.
Pump up the money-giveaway shows, where civilians grovel and emote on camera for the chance to win what amounts to a tiny percentage of the commercial take.
Grab the trowel and slap together a midseason schedule.
When all else fails, or at least when the year’s ballyhooed trend to serialized dramas falls flat, the nonfiction hours of filler are cheap to produce and ready to take up the ratings slack.
The season that was supposed to mark a stellar shift in style and a renaissance for smart dramas, bringing an incursion of high-minded serials to primetime, has fallen back to earth.
A raft of literate, complex and sometimes overpopulated serial dramas have been yanked from the schedule after failing to live up to the hype. Some serials have been outright canceled, others sent to suffer quiet deaths in hiatus-
land, the television equivalent of being on interminable “hold” listening to tinny Muzak. As the expensive dramas depart, the usual reality drivel, tabloid news and titillating game shows assume their places.
As of this week, “The Nine” (ABC) joins “Kidnapped” (NBC), “Smith” (CBS), “Vanished” (Fox), “Runaway” (CW) and “Six Degrees” (ABC) on the roster of defunct serials. Both “Six Degrees” and “The Nine” officially are being held in that secure secret location called hiatus. Don’t expect to see them again, unless it’s online.
At the start of the season, Wednesday nights offered a serial showdown fit for the DVR: NBC’s “Kidnapped” versus ABC’s “The Nine,” two suspenseful hours that required careful attention. They entailed a kidnapping, a bank robbery and hostage crisis, mysterious subplots, red herrings and an essential “Previously, on” at the top of each installment.
Previously on, currently off.
This week, Wednesday will be a contest between “Medium” and “Primetime.”
For the foreseeable future Wednesdays are awash in “Primetime: Basic Instinct,” (the newsmag series about making ethical decisions), “Biggest Loser” and (beginning in January) “Deal or No Deal.” After the midseason rejiggering, “Dateline NBC” will be trotted out for three nights a week, Tuesday, Saturday and Sunday.
Granted, some of the serials were unnecessarily convoluted. Some snared big acting talent (Dana Delany, Ray Liotta, Virginia Madsen) only to have them stand around in muddy stories that dared us to care.
And yes, it was asking a lot for viewers to follow so many plot lines and characters over so many weeks. Mindless entertainment is easier.
But “Show Me the Money”? Please. This was supposed to be the season when TV evolved. William Shatner is clearly shameless. Take heart from the fact that the ratings for that derivative mess have been as abysmal as the game itself.
ABC’s “The Nine,” one of the season’s better dramas, seemed to play to an older audience than, for instance, NBC’s “Heroes.” The difference in texture was the difference between a traditional mystery novel and a fun comic book. Both started the season on my favorites list, only one remains. “The Nine’s” interweaving of flashbacks and present time was clever at first, but the pace began to feel plodding. Ultimately, too few of us were paying attention.
“The Nine” was pulling roughly 8.6 million viewers, losing half the audience from the shows that preceded it, “Lost” and “Day Break.” Network executives can’t forgive an hour that squanders that kind of lead-in.
Now the question is, Will viewers forgive ABC for pulling “Lost” from the schedule for three months?
Unlike some seasons, there’s still plenty to watch. We’ll content ourselves with “Friday Night Lights,” at 7 tonight on Channel 9; the series moves to Wednesdays on Jan. 10.
And we’ll embrace a new mantra: Save the Cheerleader, Save the Reruns. Viewers who’ve fallen behind on “Heroes” can catch up with repeats until the series returns Jan. 22.
TV critic Joanne Ostrow can be reached at 303-954-1830 or jostrow@denverpost.com.
