As storm troopers from the Immigration and Customs Enforcement agency taught an ugly lesson to illegal immigrants at a Greeley slaughterhouse this week, I pondered what we expect of people who want to become citizens.
In their zeal to round up foreign-lookin’ folk for stealing other people’s identities in order to get meatpacking jobs, the heavily armed hordes of masked government agents detained at least one immigrant with legal status in Greeley on Tuesday. ICE released her Wednesday when her husband produced her paperwork.
Immigrants with legal status are not here illegally. In many cases, they are one step away from becoming full-fledged citizens. One of those steps, the citizenship test, is in the midst of a dramatic reworking.
So I tried answering the 144 practice questions. All of them won’t appear on every citizenship test, according to the U.S. Citizenship and Immigration Services department. It’ll just be a random 10.
At the same time, the need for knowledge is extensive enough to make you wonder if this country expects more of wannabe Americans than it does of its own native-born.
I, for instance, blanked on the name of the chief justice of the United States. I didn’t know the number of amendments to the Constitution. And I guessed wrong on the minimum age to be president.
I was able to identify the country’s longest river and its highest mountain, but I remain at a loss as to how that bears on my civic qualifications.
The government will test the citizenship exam in some cities, including Denver. To pass, applicants must answer six of 10 questions correctly. The results should be interesting.
What would be equally interesting would be to test the knowledge of the existing citizenry, especially those citizens who rant about the dangers presented to American culture by “illegal aliens.”
Making foreigners who aspire to citizenship reel off the number of members in the House of Representatives, the names of important officials and the three branches of government makes perfect sense. The double standard arises when folks born and raised here don’t know those and other facts, and no one cares.
Can Americans name exclusive functions of state and federal governments?
Can they discuss why the Constitution is called a document of “limited powers”?
Can they explain a presidential veto?
And who wrote The Federalist Papers?
Columbine High School social studies teachers Patrice Goldman, Jim Bartok and Dan Fleener were kind enough to give the citizenship exam to their classes. The kids did well for taking the test cold. They understand the basis of their government, which is a system of checks and balances meant to guarantee inalienable rights. Nevertheless, certain specific facts and figures escaped almost everyone. I found just one perfect score in all of the student exams I looked at.
A majority of kids had no clue who represents them in Congress. Dozens did not understand succession to the presidency. Most could not name the speaker of the House (Hint: It’s not “Yo’ momma.”).
I trust that the senior who ID’d Donald Rumsfeld as commander-in-chief was simply wise beyond his years.
The citizenship test spans “a huge body of knowledge,” said Goldman. “It’s fresh for us. But it’s use it or lose it.”
“If my students stood in front of King Soopers and asked these questions of people coming out, they probably wouldn’t know the answers,” Bartok predicted.
The government will provide immigrants with a study guide.
We, the home-grown, could stand a bit of review too. Americans so often mistake their accident of birth in a country of plenty for a passport to superiority.
Still, as ICE treats undocumented workers like terrorists, one Columbine student offered superb advice to citizens and noncitizens alike.
Asked to explain the “rule of law,” the kid replied simply, “Don’t break it.”
To answer questions from the new citizenship exam, record your score and comment on the test, go to denverpost.com/spencer.
Jim Spencer’s column appears Monday, Wednesday and Friday. He can be reached at 303-954-1771 or jspencer@denverpost.com.
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Think you can ace the citizenship exam?
to take the 144-question test, and then check your answers and compare how you did with other readers.
This story has been corrected in this online archive. Originally, due to an editing error, it incorrectly stated that ICE agents detained a naturalized citizen in their raid. In fact at least one of those detained had legal status. It also stated that naturalized citizens were one step away from full-fledged citizenship. Naturalized citizens have completed all the steps to be citizens, including passing a citizenship exam.
