Dear Amy: My husband and I own a small consulting business.
Last year we hired a friend of ours, “Sandy,” as an administrative assistant. She works 30 hours a week. We pay her above average wages for her position ($4 an hour more than her previous position) and are flexible with her hours. She is organized and does a good job.
Sandy is divorced and in her 50s. She frequently says she is not making ends meet. My husband gave her a week’s pay as a bonus last Christmas, even though she had worked for us for only three weeks.
He then gave her $275 after the first quarter working with us because he felt sorry for her and she said she had received bonuses on her previous job.
She has gone to my husband on several occasions and cried about not having enough money. She once asked for a $200 loan, and when it was time to repay, she asked that we hold the check until a future date.
After several postponements, he eventually tore up the check because it was evident that she “couldn’t” pay him back.
In June, her daughter was getting married and she cried to my husband that she did not have enough money to go to the wedding. My husband gave her almost $200 out of petty cash.
I think she is being manipulative and taking advantage of our friendship. My husband says that he feels sorry for her. The holidays are coming, and she is already talking about how broke she is.
Now that she has been with us for a year, she is expecting a lot more.
Why do we tolerate this? My husband says he doesn’t want to go through the effort of training another person. What is your opinion? What should we do? Is she taking advantage of our friendship, or am I being uncharitable? — Fed-up
Dear Fed-up: I’m hoping that “Sandy” might consider swapping jobs with me. She has a sweet deal with flexible hours, a soft touch of a boss and unlimited cash bonuses. (Every time I cry to my boss he hands me a tissue and politely asks me to go back to work.) Sandy’s behavior (and your husband’s response) is bad for business.
If I had a financial stake in your company, I’d be distressed to see the profits being invested in one employee in this way, and if I were a fellow employee in your company, I’d wonder why one person was getting paid so much extra.
I find it hard to believe that it is so challenging to train a new employee that it would be worth going through this drama and nonsense to keep Sandy around.
However, if your company wants to continue employing her, you could count up the bonus money she has received over the past year and consider raising her annual salary by roughly that amount.
When she is told of the raise, she should also be told that she will not be receiving any more bonuses.
If she can’t live on what she is making, perhaps she should work more hours a week, get a second job, or pursue employment elsewhere.
Take that, Ebenezer Scrooge!
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