The most frustrating thing about sitting back for three years watching judges and lawyers argue whether on-stage smoking should be protected as free speech is how painfully evident it is how little time any of them have actually spent in a theater.
We live in a society where those who make the rules often have no actual experience within the worlds they legislate.
Curious Theatre has been smacked down in its every attempt to win an exemption to the state’s indoor smoking ban for theatrical performances. So last week, the company announced it is taking its case to the U.S. Supreme Court, which in all likelihood will never hear it.
The arguments against allowing stage smoking are boggling, but not even Curious’ well-intentioned lawyers have effectively made their case in district or state supreme court.
In short: The state says smoking is harmful and public health concerns supercede the right to creative expression.
First, theaters don’t want to use real tobacco, they want to use what they say are non-carcinogenic herbs that serve no significant threat to public health. One state attorney said until Curious commissioned a long-term study that proves secondhand tea smoke doesn’t cause cancer, the state would never abide.
Great, see you in 2110.
Another state attorney actually invoked the gay-marriage “where does it stop?” argument. (I say avatars and Chia Pets. That’s where that should stop). If allowed, what’s to stop a theater company from writing a play that called on actors to walk into the audience and blow smoke right in patrons’ faces? (Well, that’s what the exit door is for. . . . Unless the state wants to legalize strapping in paying audiences until they’re done with them.)
Ironic that the state has adopted a zero-tolerance policy for stage smoking, yet it allows smoking in airport lounges. Good to know Coloradans are fully protected from the possibility of secondhand herb smoke wafting out from a stage and glomming onto your lung lining. But when you walk out of that theater and breathe in all of those legal carcinogens blowing into the air from tens of thousands of vehicles? You’re on your own there. That’s how your state prioritizes your threat to public safety.
Most aggravating is the state’s argument that smoking, like gunshots and drunkenness, can be easily and adequately faked on stage. People get shot on stage all the time, and no one believes the actor has actually died.
But the purest intent of theater is to create the illusion of reality. The best theater absorbs audiences into a world where, for that one moment, they believe what they are seeing is absolutely real.
Fakery takes audiences out of the moment. Fake a gunshot and no blood comes out, and your mind cries, “Fake!” Bad drunk acting can make audiences laugh when they are supposed to cry. That can create a massive distraction for everyone.
So what of fake cigarettes? Talcum cigs expel a powder that some say, from a distance, looks like smoke. In fact, it looks stupid. First, you don’t puff in on a talcum cigarette. You blow out, often spewing talcum all over your shirt.
The most surreal moment of this whole bizarre legal odyssey took place back in 2006, when Curious’ lawyers tried to demonstrate to a district judge the utter lack of believability of such substitutes. Judson Webb, a co-plaintiff from the late Theatre 13, blew into a fake plastic cigarette, shooting a blue burst of talcum into the air. It looked nothing like exhaled smoke. Onlookers in the court snickered. But the judge said it looked real enough for him.
In some of the best plays ever written, smoking can convey an emotion just as effectively as any line of dialogue — for example, Martha blowing smoke in George’s face in “Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf?”
If an exemption is not granted, many plays, some of them classics, just won’t get performed again, and that is a form of self-censorship.
While Curious lost in the Colorado Supreme Court by a 6-1 vote, attention should be paid to the lone voice of dissent, Justice Gregory Hobbs, who argued that not allowing the theatrical exemption serves no significant governmental interest. He believes smoke communicates plot, depicts characters and can evoke a specific era.
Most important, he said the intent of Colorado’s ban is to protect nonsmokers from involuntary exposure to environmental tobacco smoke . . . and theater is nothing if not voluntary.
It’s also worth noting that no one arguing for a stage exemption opposes the indoor smoking ban itself.
But 12 of the 24 states that have smoking bans have also reasonably concluded that an exception for live performances does not compromise the overall ban.
Colorado should join them. Do it, and watch this unnecessary, endless legal wrangling go up in smoke.
John Moore: 303-954-1056 or jmoore@denverpost.com
The Denver Post’s editorial board responds: No ifs, ands or butts
You don’t use real guns to shoot people in theatrical performances. And actors don’t actually die on stage to depict death.
Why do actors need real cigarettes to give audiences the idea that a character is smoking on stage?
They don’t.
While we believe it is a constitutionally protected right of expression for actors to depict smoking, we don’t think they have the right to violate the Colorado ban on indoor smoking in order to do so.
The Colorado Supreme Court made the right call in a decision issued last month that addressed whether the smoking ban infringed on the right to free speech. The court said using prop cigarettes allows for communication of the idea, just as exotic dancers can be required to wear pasties and G-strings and still convey the message of exotic dancing.
If actors are proficient at their craft and use the appropriate props, they should be able to set the scene or strike the proper mood without actually using a real burning butt.
At least one of the Denver theater companies that challenged the smoking ban’s application to dramatic performances now will petition the U.S. Supreme Court on the matter. The Curious Theatre wants its actors to be able to smoke herbs that are rolled in paper to look like cigarettes.
Smoke is smoke. And while burning something other than tobacco may not be quite as harmful, smoke inhalation is not good for people.
We hope the U.S. Supreme Court, if it takes the case, finds actors don’t need an actual burning cigarette in order to convey the idea that someone is smoking.
It is acting, after all.
This week’s theater openings
Opening Thursday, Jan. 7, through Feb. 20: Victorian Playhouse’s “Voices In The Dark”
Opening Thursday, Jan. 7, through Jan. 28: Black Box Burlesque’s “Too Sexy for the Stock Show” (Thursdays only, at Bender’s Tavern)
Opening Friday, Jan. 8, through Jan. 31: Town Hall Arts Center’s “Sylvia”
Opening Friday, Jan. 8, through Feb. 14: Carousel Dinner Theatre’s “Annie” Fort Collins
Opening Friday, Jan. 8, through Jan. 10: Theatre Company of Lafayette’s “Senior Moments”
Opening Friday, Jan. 8, through Jan. 29: Miners Alley Playhouse’s “A Picasso” (Fridays only, at the Mercury Cafe)
Opening Friday, Jan. 8, through Feb 14: E-Project’s “My Fair Lady” Lakewood
Opening Friday, Jan. 8, through Jan. 16: Curtains Up’s “The Odd Couple”
Opening Saturday, Jan. 9, through Feb. 6: Curious’ “Home By Dark”
Opening Saturday, Jan. 9, through Jan. 30: OpenStage’s “The Glass Menagerie” Fort Collins
This week’s theater closings
Today, Jan. 3: 73rd Avenue Theatre’s “A Christmas Cactus”
Today, Jan. 3: Bas Bleu’s “Vaughn, NM, Christmas Eve, 1956” and “A Child’s Christmas in Wales” Fort Collins
Today, Jan. 3: Candlelight Dinner Playhouse’s “Christmas by Candlelight” Johnstown
Saturday, Jan. 10: Jesters Dinner Theatre’s “Nuncrackers” Longmont
Saturday, Jan. 10: Lake Dillon’s “A Walk in the Woods”
The 2009 Denver Post Ovation Awards
2009 Ovation Award winners honoring the best in Colorado theater.
The ninth annual list of winners has been released. Go here to find:
Our story on 2009 Theater Person of the Year Kathleen M.. Brady:
Our complete list of 2009 winners, with pictures and explanations:
Complete list of 2009 nominees:
Complete list of eligible shows:
Complete list of all Ovation Award winners, 2001-09:
This week’s video podcast
The Denver Post will soon launch a web page dedicated to all things high-school theater in Colorado. In this video introduction, John Moore tells you all you need to know to be a part of “Standing O.” Run time: 4 minutes, 30 seconds.
Complete theater listings
Go to our complete list of in Colorado, including summaries, run dates, addresses, phones and links to every company’s home page. Or check out our listings or
The Running Lines blog
Catch up on John Moore’s roundup of theater news and dialogue. This week, lots of talk about the 2009 Denver Post Ovation Awards.
