Adam Carolla’s days co-hosting “The Man Show” clearly influenced the title of his first book, “In 50 Years We’ll All Be Chicks . . . And Other Complaints from an Angry Middle-Aged White Guy.”
But the king of all podcasts is a keen observer first and a boorish, beer-quaffing buddy a distant second.
“In 50 Years” gathers up every rant Carolla has made over his long-running Comedy Central show, his short-lived radio show and podcast. It’s not radically different from other stand-up tomes, and by the halfway mark he ditches the first part of the book’s title for a potpourri of “Complaints.”
The author works blue and wallows in politically incorrect waters. But strip away the bluster, and you’ll find a gimlet-eyed comic crushing cultural mores as few of his peers can.
That’s the highfalutin way of saying “In 50 Years” is a very funny read, a rumble through the mind of a storyteller whose nasal delivery translates fluidly to written form.
Carolla provides a quick biographical sketch for those unfamiliar with his work. He grew up poor with uninterested parents, and when he got fed up with swinging a hammer to pay the bills he took a crack at comedy. Fate, hustle and talent opened the door enough for him to slide through.
The author rails against modern-day male archetypes, from the “My wife’s my best friend” guy to the “I don’t own a TV” guy to set up his central thesis.
The “wussification” of male culture stems from a heady brew of politically correct thinking, an abject fear of lawsuits and the need to appear enlightened at all costs. Why must every kid in class suffer a peanut-butter free childhood on the chance one of the 400 students has a peanut allergy?
It all starts at an early age.
“Kids today are soft, fat and self-entitled,” he cries, and it can’t be blamed on video games or junk food. Rather, consider the obstacles we take away that used to make men out of boys — like the intimidating rope in gym class that no one could climb.
Feminists are strongly advised to clench their teeth in anticipation of what’s to come. Not only does Carolla employ unflattering terms like “chick,” and worse, to describe the fairer sex, he castigates women for obsessing over giant hoop earrings, nail polish colors and for throwing a flag on sexual harassment at the work place.
His calcified anger spikes when describing the minimum wage jockeys working at airports and amusement parks who make life miserable for the rest of us . . . because they can.
Carolla’s “Other Complaints” include his Everyman take on politics. He swats both the left (for so-called torture complaints) and the right (anti-euthanasia voters) with alacrity. He’s an undeclared Libertarian eager to legalize drugs, marijuana and same-sex marriage.
He walks a cultural tightrope with “This Chapter Is Not a Hate Crime,” which tackles racial stereotypes and so-called “diversity seminars” with the goal of genuine tolerance — and keeping cultural differences fair game for comics. The chapter could use some fine tuning. Carolla seems more engaged by the lack of advancement with ketchup packet technology.
Not every “Complaint” is welcome. A segment deconstructing Mother Nature finds Carolla floundering, and his list of great movies and songs feels more narcissistic than amusing — even if his tastes are right on.
“In 50 Years” wraps with a kinder, gentler Carolla offering some life lessons to his fan base — including how to deal with a nasty zit and the importance of having the perfect retort at the ready at all times.
It’s not the kind of material one might expect from Carolla, a personality known for hiring top-heavy girls to jump on trampolines. But it’s typical of a comic who routinely defies an image that never really fit in the first place.
Christian Toto is a freelance writer in Denver.
NONFICTION
In Fifty Years We’ll All Be Chicks: And Other Complaints From an Angry Middle-Aged White Guy
am Carolla, $25
