Welcome back from maternity leave, Carrie Underwood! Not sure if you can tell, but Nashville is really excited that you’re here.
In her much-hyped first televised performance since giving birth three months ago, the country superstar landed three trophies at the CMT Music Awards on Wednesday, including the Video of the Year for her hit “Something in the Water.”
Really, the whole night was an Underwood love-fest: Host Erin Andrews proclaimed her love for the singer, as she cropped herself into Underwood’s wedding photos and orchestrated a song called “Carrie Crush,” a parody of Little Big Town’s “Girl Crush.”
Underwood’s success couldn’t have come at a more fitting time for the industry, recently rocked by a silly-sounding but actually fairly unsettling controversy known as #Saladgate, in which a radio consultant advised stations that to increase ratings, data shows they should play fewer songs by women (calling them the “tomatoes” in the country music salad). Predictably, it took all of two minutes for Andrews and her co-host, Brittany Snow, to make a joke about it on stage: “It’s the first time (the show’s) been hosted by a couple of tomatoes!”
Anyway, given that the CMT Awards are always a strange experience, here are nine lessons we learned from the night.
1. The CMT Awards thinks everybody should get a prize.
Besides Underwood, the prizes were spread out so evenly it seemed like there was a rule that every big star who showed up should walk away with something, including Luke Bryan (Male Video, “Play It Again”); Jason Aldean (CMT Performance, “Turn the Page” with Bob Seger); Miranda Lambert (Collaborative Video, “Somethin’ Bad” with Underwood); Florida Georgia Line (Duo Video, “Dirt”); Lady Antebellum (Group Video, “Bartender”) and Sam Hunt (Breakthrough Video, “Leave the Night On”).
Meanwhile, here’s a fun fact: For the last nine years, the Video of the Year trophy (the most coveted of them all) has gone to either Underwood or Taylor Swift.
2. If you definitely want to win a trophy in any genre, put Kate Upton in your music video.
Charles Kelley of Lady Antebellum admitted as much on stage while the trio accepted the Group Video prize for “Bartender,” which indeed starred the swimsuit model. “For the first time ever, Charles and Dave (Haywood) showed up early,” Hillary Scott dryly noted of her bandmates. “Wonder why.”
3. Jake Owen wants to be Katy Perry.
At least, that’s what Twitter assumed when his performance of new single “Real Life” looked just like a typical Katy Perry candy-coated beach party set-up — cue the #LeftShark jokes.
4. Eric Church can blow everyone away with a slow song.
5. If you’re going to host a country music awards show without a connection to the country music world, at least be entertaining.
“Hmmmm,” you may be wonder. “Why would sports reporter Erin Andrews and ‘Pitch Perfect 2″′ actress Brittany Snow host a country award show?” Excellent question! We have no idea. But the hosts didn’t seem to have any idea either, which makes us feel better.
Then again, actress Kristen Bell has nothing to do with Nashville and she expertly hosted the show solo last year. The difference? Bell has comedy chops, while these two … well, let’s just say most of the well-intentioned jokes fell flat. In fact, Bell upstaged both of them when she appeared in a previously filmed bit offering them advice: “Don’t look Luke Bryan in the eyes. It’s a beautiful lagoon and you’ll drown in it.” “If, and I mean when, you get into a drinking contest with Toby Keith, the safe word is ‘mudflap.'”
6. Luke Bryan is dreamy.
Speaking of the genre’s top hitmaker, did you know he’s very attractive? If not, there were numerous jokes pointing to his good looks, including one from Justin Bieber (!) of all people, who appeared in a sketch with James Corden driving a car pretending to go to the CMT Awards so they could see their favorite singer. It led to this exchange between the two: “I love Luke Bryan!” “Are you serious? I love Luke Bryan!” “He’s so awesome!” “He’s so hot!” “He’s hot.” “I get lost in his eyes.”
7. Nicole Kidman knows all the words to her husband Keith Urban’s songs.
The camera likes to frequently cut to the actress during award shows to remind everyone of this fact, and Urban’s performance of “John Cougar, John Deere, John 3:16″″ was no exception.
8. Steven Tyler is really going all in on this “country” thing.
Yes, the Aerosmith frontman is cutting a country album, and he got lots of screen time to goof off with Alan Jackson in a sketch.
9. The love between Carrie Underwood and Nashville is mutual.
With three acceptance speeches, she had plenty of time to gush about how much she loved country music fans. She also gave a shout-out to her new baby son, Isaiah — as well as her husband, hockey player Mike Fisher, who was beaming in the audience.
“This was my first award show since little Isaiah has been in the world … I’m sure he’s napping on the bus right now. But I should definitely say that he has already inspired me so much as well as my husband, Mike,” Underwood said.
(Our annual note: The CMT Music Awards are fan-voted and for music videos. This show is not to be confused with CBS’ Academy of Country Music Awards in April, or ABC’s Country Music Association Awards in November, known as the most prestigious trophy of them all.)
