Dear Amy: I am in a quandary about what to do about some tooth fairies that have started to loom large in our family life.
I have three daughters. Two are teenagers and one, “Emma,” is 7 years old.
The tooth fairy saga began when Emma decided to leave letters and small presents for the tooth fairy under her pillow. She spent a lot of time writing charming letters, adorned with pictures, and making tiny gifts, which her two teenage sisters collected, then returned lovely and elaborate letters from numerous “fairies.” My older daughters adore their little sister and have shown amazing creativity in preparing these replies. However, they are worried that when she eventually finds out that these “fairies” are not real, she will be upset with them for “fooling” her.
This correspondence is one of many activities that have strengthened my daughters’ bonds with their little sister, so I do not think this little fantasy is a bad thing. But should we tell Emma the truth to keep her from being hurt later, or will she just eventually realize the source of her fairy letters and not react in the negative way that we assume?
– Anxious Fairy Odd-Mother
Dear Anxious: Kids don’t have enough opportunities to engage with their homemade fantasies these days. I would let this continue without worrying too much about it, unless “Emma’s” behavior changes in a way that concerns you.
“Emma” is nearing an age when the dimmer switch will start to slowly turn the light bulb on. She will realize that some of the things that she believes in are not necessarily of this world. I also hope that she will continue to believe in the magic of her own imagination.
If she asks you to tell her the real source of these letters, then you should tell her the truth. Keep her letters and illustrations, as well as her sisters’ replies. They will be a charming reminder of a magical time in your family’s life.
Your family might enjoy watching the movie “Finding Neverland.” This film tells the story of J.M. Barrie and his relationship with the family that inspired him to write “Peter Pan.”
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Dear Amy: I read with amusement the letter from “Braless and Wondering,” the young woman who asked why women still wear bras.
Speaking strictly for myself, gravity is not my friend. What is perky and taut when you are in your 20s becomes very unperky and untaut after two kids and 30 more years.
Wearing or not wearing a bra has nothing to do with feminism – and I am an “old- school” feminist. Wearing a bra has everything to do with support and comfort.
– Patti
Dear Patti: I have been fascinated by women’s attitudes toward their brassieres. I’ll run some representative responses in an upcoming column.
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