Dear Amy: God has blessed us with four blond-haired, blue-eyed, adorable children who are very social, engaging and, for the most part, very well-behaved. They also all happen to be born in a four-year time span, so their ages are 5, 4, 2 and 8 months.
I have complete strangers stop me EVERY time I go somewhere and the comments are about 50/50 between well-intentioned and downright rude.
People almost always ask their age span, and then will say, “You’ve got your hands full.” “You’re a brave woman.” “Are they all yours?” “Are you going to have more?” and on and on.
I even had a total stranger say to me, “I hope you got your tubes tied – don’t you know where babies come from?” Today, when the fourth person in five minutes stopped me at the mall, I noticed that my older two children were taking note and seemed bothered by it. I would never dream of going up to someone with one child and saying, “Is that the ONLY child you’re going to have?” What is a good response that won’t make my kids feel as if they are a freak show at the circus?
– Jodi, in Wauconda, Ill.
Dear Jodi: While some of these comments sound benign, I can understand why the sheer volume of commentary would get to you. Please remember, however, that each person speaking to you is unaware of all of the other people who have commented on your family.
A quick, “Well, thanks for your input!” might strike the right note of politeness laced with a tiny amount of sarcasm.
Seeing “The Sound of Music” might inspire your towheaded children to come up with a musical response. “So long, farewell, auf Wiedersehen, goodbye …”
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Dear Amy: The letter in your column from “Craig” gave me chills.
Parents providing snack bags for their college-age children while attending sporting events with them? Get a grip! Bring back the days of parents going out dancing with friends while the kids stay home with a TV dinner! And we wonder why a generation has grown up with a powerful sense of entitlement, and why parents often feel disrespected by their offspring. I’d have had serious doubts about my parents’ ability to parent if I had ever thought their primary role was to indulge me. Yikes.
– Janice
Dear Janice: Perhaps parents of college-age children are indulging their kids so much because THEIR parents went out dancing and left them home with a TV dinner.
OK. I’m kidding. But I hope that you see that this is part of the mighty pendulum swing. Bringing snack bags to college games is waaaaaay over the top.
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