Dear Amy: I was in a busy store where there was a long line. Some of the children in line were getting tired and cranky.
Just behind me were what appeared to be a grandmother, mother and two young children. While the mother was gone from the line for a few seconds, the 2-year-old started acting up.
The grandmother told her to behave or she would “get a pinch.” I wrongly assumed this was an empty threat, but when the little one didn’t stop squirming, the grandmother pinched her on the inside of her thigh! When the child started crying and yelling, the mother ran over and kept asking, “What happened?
Why is she so upset?” The grandmother stood there and acted as if she didn’t know what was wrong.
I felt terrible that I hadn’t done anything to stop this.
– Susan
Dear Susan: If you could replay the scene over again, knowing what you now know, when the grandmother threatened to pinch the child, you could have turned around and said, “I certainly hope that you’re not going to really do that.”
I understand that directly intervening places anyone in a tough spot. However, I have heard from many people who were mistreated as children and reported with gratitude the times when strangers did intervene.
…
Dear Amy: I met a guy last weekend who is quite a bit older than I am. I’m 23; he is around 33. I live in Chicago; he lives in Boston.
We wound up spending an entire day together talking and enjoying ourselves. When we met, I knew that I liked him romantically, but because of the age gap and the distance, between us, I told myself to enjoy our moment together – and leave it at that.
Are these obstacles enough to destroy any possibility of romance?
– Dwelling in Possibility
Dear Dwelling: Romance-wise, you’ve certainly got potential. Long-distance relationships can be romantic. The age gap between the two of you is only an impediment depending on your relative maturity levels.
However, you say that you know how your guy feels. I promise you that after even the loveliest soul-swapping day spent in each other’s company, you do not know how he feels. You don’t know much at all about him.
If the two of you get to know each other, the space between you can force you to move slowly, and that’s a good thing.
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