This little piece of gum is a three-course meal.
Bull.
No, roast beef. But I havent gotten it quite right yet.
Willy Wonka
Jolly Cholly and The Rox Factory are back blowing bubbles and packing meat. Bull or roast beef?
Charlie Monfort is one of my favorite people on the planet. Jolly Cholly Monfort is not one of my favorite sports franchise owners in the whole wide world of sports.
Jolly Cholly talks more than George Steinbrenner, king of the Yankees, ever did and tends to contradict himself more than George III, king of the English, ever did.
I am a bit confused by Jolly Cholly. According to multiple media outlets, he seems (again) to offer paradoxical statements on the future of the clubs general manager and manager, the teams fortunes this season, the sanctity of baseball ownership and the role of religion in the National League West division race.
Maybe hes just misquoting himself.
In December, News columnist Dave Krieger wrote that he asked Jolly Cholly if he would let general manager Dan ODowd and manager Clint Hurdle finish out the final year of their contracts without extensions. Absolutely, the Rox owner was quoted as replying. I think weve been very patient with them because I believe, we all do, that were on the right track. If that proves to be wrong, then we have to assess it, but I think well be successful. … Cant put a number on it, but more successful than last year.
In a previous year Jolly Cholly said: In pro sports, a management person in the final year of his contract is unfortunately viewed as a true lame duck. We wanted to take that issue off the radar screen and have everyone concentrate on the games being played on the field.
Jolly Cholly has been quoted by The Posts Troy E. Renck as saying: I see Dan and Clints situation as totally different. Its just that their contracts are coming up at the same time, and theyve worked together so people think they are hooked at the hip. Thats not true.
He also was quoted as saying: I think you will see (ODowd) as our GM for quite awhile. He was not quoted as saying you would see Hurdle for quite awhile.
And Jolly Cholly has put a number on the number of games the Rockies must win this year for someone, but not him, to be held responsible: 81.
The thing is, we think we can win the division. That goal is admirable, although most experts are picking the Rockies to end up in last place, and the over-under in Las Vegas is 74 1/2 victories, although I dont see
the Rockies ever getting half a victory, unless its a moral half-victory.
But morals could be important. Jolly Cholly was quoted last season in USA Today as saying, I dont want to offend anyone (which certainly did offend many), but I think character-wise were stronger than anyone in baseball.
Christians, and what theyve endured, are some of the strongest people in baseball. I believe God sends signs, and were seeing them.
God wasnt responsible for the Rockies collapse, and she wasnt responsible for the signs the Rockies hitters and baserunners missed last year.
Were planning on winning the division, and wed rather do it with Todd (Helton), Jolly Cholly said. The Rockies had just tried to trade Helton – It is not good wisdom to have so much of your payroll tied up on one player, he said – and failed. Weve been building toward this for four or five years, and I think our time is here. … Not to steal a phrase from Tony Dungy (coach of the Super Bowl champions), but it is our time.
Im confused again. Win 81 games? Win the division? Win the World Series? Are ODowd and Hurdle Cheng & Eng? Are they judged together or separately. Are they on a short leash or a long rope?
Jolly Cholly last year ripped the Red Sox when they reneged on a deal. If thats what it takes to be world champions, then people are right, we will never be one, because we dont operate and treat other organizations like (Boston). When the Helton trade with the Red Sox was not completed, Jolly Cholly ratted out the names of the players the Red Sox wanted to send to Colorado. So much for not being like the Red Sox ownership.
Jolly Cholly welcomed Helton back – We cant wait to see him in Tucson. – but The Baltimore Sun reported that the Rox then went straight to the Orioles in another attempt.
Oh, and the latest news is Jolly Cholly has indicated an extension for ODowd could be imminent.
Jolly Chollys Folly continues.
What would Willy Wonka do?
Staff writer Woody Paige can be reached at 303-954-1095 or at wpaige@denverpost.com.
