Adapted from an online discussion with career advice columnist Lily Garcia.
Q: I’ve applied for county and state jobs. There is a good chance that the hiring managers might know my supervisor or higher-ups. Is there anything to stop hiring managers from telling my supervisor I am searching? (It’s at home on my own time.) Can my employer fire me if it finds out I’m searching? My employer has done this to another employee, calling it disloyalty.
A: There is nothing to stop a hiring manager from telling your employer that you are looking, which is why you need to make it perfectly clear that your job search is confidential. Request that your employer not be contacted unless and until your prospective employer is ready to make an offer. You could, in fact, be fired if your job search is discovered.
Q: Can you give me some advice about deflecting a boss (of the same gender) who wants me to share a hotel room with her on business trips to save money? I don’t have the best relationship with her. She’s accused me of being “sensitive” when I tell her I won’t share a room with her. I will with co-workers because the relationship is different.
So far I’ve managed to deflect her, but we have a trip coming up that’s just the two of us, and she may cancel the trip if I demand my own room. Is the law on my side? Is there any tips for handling this with tact?
A: If you were repeatedly forced to share a room and your boss displayed immodesty that made you uncomfortable, the time might be right for you to think about your internal and external complaint options. At this point, however, I think that it is most important for you to stand your ground and explain politely, yet firmly, why the thought of seeing your boss or being seen by your boss partially or completely undressed makes you uncomfortable. I don’t think you’re being overly sensitive.
