Watching the Rockies throw errant ball after ball (they dubiously lead the league in walks), it reminds me of fans throwing out the first pitch, because the next time someone throws a strike on the first pitch, it will be the first first-pitch strike in first-pitch history.
But besides peanuts and PEDs, there are few greater time-honored traditions in baseball than some person awkwardly throwing a 57-foot pitch with the elegance of Cosmo Kramer.
Yet, the ceremonial first pitch lives on, whether it’s a celebrity or a nobody or a celebrity who will someday be a nobody.
During my extensive research (on Wikipedia and on Wikipedia), I learned a lot about ceremonial first pitches, including this tidbit: “There is typically no batter.”
Here are some other tidbits:
• The first person to throw out a first pitch was, of course, Okuma Shigenobu, the Japanese prime minister in 1908.
• The first U.S. president to throw out a first pitch was William Howard Taft, who did so on Opening Day in 1910 and 1911, but skipped 1912, following the death of his friend, Archibald Butt, who died on the Titanic. (Butt’s real full name was Archibald Willingham DeGraffenreid Clarendon Butt, which is eerie because my full name is actually Benjamin Willingham DeGraffenreid Clarendon Hochman).
• In 1940, FDR threw out a first pitch, accidentally smashing the camera of Washington Post photographer Irving Schlossenberg. According to , he kept that photo on his wall for the rest of his life.
For me, few things make me laugh when I simply think of the thing. Here’s one of them: when Cincinnati mayor Mark Mallory threw out the first pitch. The look on the face of former Reds star Eric Davis is classic (and I like how the mayor does the practice throwing motion after his real throw, as if to suggest that maybe he wasn’t warmed up enough — and that’s why he threw the ball to Kentucky).
Just this past week, a first pitch combined my favorite movie (“The Godfather” notwithstanding) and my favorite dance (“Electric Slide” notwithstanding).
The Oscar-snubbed actor from “Weekend At Bernie’s” and its spellbinding sequel threw out the first pitch in Oakland this week. If you’re not familiar with the sequel, the Bernie character, who is not alive, somehow does come alive on occasion — but only to do some ridiculous dance.
Last year, some fellows turned that dance .
Here are the best dancers at doing said dance.
And so … here’s our hero in Oakland ().
And finally, since you’ve wasted enough time watching videos already, here are the 10-worst first pitches ever.
Benjamin Hochman: 303-954-1294, bhochman@denverpost.com or twitter.com/nuggetsnews
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