FORT COLLINS — The two mannequins, dressed from head to toe in green-and-gold football uniforms, stood sentry at the door. They served as silent bouncers at the entrance to the dingy, concrete-gray room where Colorado State coach Jim McElwain meets the press after games at Hughes Stadium.
“We’ve got door guards now?” asked McElwain, chuckling as he did a double take at the mannequins. The coach was in a good mood. His Rams looked unbeatable Saturday, crushing hapless UC Davis 49-21.
Heck, those mannequins could have gotten behind the slow UC Davis defense that was beaten for 425 yards passing by Colorado State quarterback Garrett Grayson.
But how could have the Rams really used the mannequins? To fill the stands.
In fact, with an embarrassingly sparse crowd of 21,202 on a gorgeous late-summer afternoon, there is absolutely no reason for Colorado State to spend about $250 million to build a new stadium on campus.
Truth be known, it would probably be a lot cheaper to buy another 10,000 mannequins and make them permanent fixtures at Hughes Stadium, the outdated, inconveniently located facility where the vast majority of CSU alums will never go, regardless of how good a program McElwain is building.
After embarrassing a visitor from the Big Sky Conference with 676 yards of total offense, McElwain said: “We wanted to go out and dominate an opponent.”
Mission accomplished.
Sorry you missed it, CSU alums.
From any of the good seats that sat empty, it was easy to see how the Rams could be the No. 1 team in the country. Believe me, under the brilliant direction of McElwain, CSU could win the national championship.
All the Rams have to do is what’s reasonable. They can give up competing with Alabama, Notre Dame and the rest of the fat cats in college football.
Drop down to the FCS division, formerly known as Division I-AA, and Colorado State could not only win the Big Sky title eight years out of 10, it could concentrate its recruiting base along the Front Range and be a threat to win the playoffs against every FCS program from Montana to Maine.
Perhaps, when the wind blows from the North, even apathetic CSU alums in Denver have heard the ruckus emanating from Fort Collins. Not the weak noise from the stadium, where the Rams averaged 18,600 spectators during six home games in 2013, which was a 42-year low for football attendance at the school.
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All the real screaming and yelling in Fort Fun of late has been about how a new stadium built on the grounds of the university is destined to be: A) The centerpiece of a thriving campus, or B) A white elephant that would irritate the neighbors. Colorado State athletic director Jack Graham, who championed the stadium project, was fired during the nasty crossfire of debate.
A new stadium on campus? The Rams don’t need no stinkin’ new stadium.
I love college football. So I wish it really mattered around here.
But, let’s keep it real. Football doesn’t matter to Colorado State, a fine academic institution with fading memories of the glory years of Sonny Lubick. Football is not anywhere near the tip of the tongue for CSU graduates in Denver — or Denver mayor Michael Hancock, for that matter. Heck, football is unimportant to most of the current students who wouldn’t bother to cross Fort Collins to watch the Rams play.
The folks who did show up to Hughes had fun in the sun. Brats sizzled on grills in the parking lot. Kids bounded up and down rows of empty bleachers. That the Rams dropped seven touchdowns on the Aggies seemed almost secondary to most of the fans, many who arrived fashionably late and left the game long before the fourth quarter was done.
Money is tearing a rift in college football between the haves and have-nots. Or the obsessed and the sane, if you prefer. In Alabama, it’s not unheard of to hear somebody yell “Roll, Tide!” at a funeral to put a smile on a sad face. At Colorado State, football never will be a matter of life and death.
The Rams are supposed to make a decision on the stadium project in October.
Save the $250 million, CSU.
Join the Big Sky Conference.
Even without a football factory, this place can be Fort Fun.
Mark Kiszla: mkiszla@denverpost.com or
