My son graduated from high school last week — my second child to leave the nest and the final event capping a spring of milestones for me that included both my college (30th) and graduate school (25th) reunions.
I was thrilled to reconnect with classmates and learn more about their lives.
The reunions also gave me the opportunity to reflect on how differently men and women navigate their professional lives, and hopefully to impart some wisdom onto my now college freshman and his classmates.
When I graduated from the Wharton School of Business, only a small community of women was admitted to top business schools. Women constituted just 30 percent of my class. This year’s graduating class is 42 percent female — higher, but still less than our representation in the population or in the workforce.
My son’s class at an elite private high school in Denver, however, was nearly 60 percent female. Those rock star young women, most of whom are headed to the nation’s top echelon of schools, won a majority of the awards, as well.
While some studies show the percentage of working women in the U.S. is on the decline, the great majority of women I graduated with from Wharton remain engaged in their careers.
This driven group of women occupies a wide range of positions in an array of industries. One friend is a powerful executive in the male-dominated transportation industry. One is the CEO of a major university health center. Others are consultants and successful entrepreneurs.
So what have I observed these past few months?
• Men change lanes, while women take detours.
I noticed that regardless of the industry we worked in or position we held, many of my female peers and I had experienced various “detours” during the course of our careers. These were often prompted by work-life balance issues or other workforce challenges.
My own detour essentially led me to business school after I experienced sexism in my first banking job that made me reconsider a career on Wall Street. Then again later, when balancing a demanding corporate marketing job, a long commute and motherhood became untenable, I took another detour and launched an online retailer for children’s sporting goods.
My female colleagues shared similar experiences. They have taken detours and off ramps or have shifted gears to achieve better work-life integration.
In contrast, the men in my class seemed to follow a more linear path and more commonly simply “switched lanes” by taking new jobs or entering new fields.
• Women need to stay connected professionally. Before our reunion officially started, a group of male classmates gathered in Atlantic City for dinner and a golf outing. That meeting gave those men the chance not only to socialize but discuss career challenges and strengthen their professional bond.
If any of those men needed a favor or professional advice, they could easily turn to anyone in that group for help. The idea of gathering in the same way never occurred to me or my female classmates, probably because we wanted to minimize the time away from our families.
It’s clear to me that we need to take more opportunities to build a similar “old girls network” to support ourselves in our professional development.
• The desire to learn remains strong. Even after staying up until all hours of the night, my classmates and I managed to make it to a full slate of educational sessions offered as part of the reunion, covering everything from investing to energy policy to customer loyalty.
It was exciting to be with a community of 50-plus-year-olds interested in expanding their knowledge. That willingness to learn can mean the difference between career — and personal — growth and stagnation.
Embracing these types of learning opportunities in my own life have allowed me to make many career transitions.
So a little advice to school alum young and old: If you have a reunion in your near future, I urge you to attend.
Think of these celebrations not as a time to compare notes but a time to reconnect with potentially valuable contacts, share lessons that might help you grow personally and professionally, and expand both your personal and professional network.