Q: My daughter is 14. She has to be perfect in most everything she does, including her school work She works on her homework all through dinner and often doesn’t finish until after midnight. She told me that she rereads each sentence on the pages of her book, sometimes starting at the top with every new sentence. She takes one hour to brush her teeth. This can’t be normal behavior, but I’m not sure what to do.
– J.F.
A: Your description of your daughter’s actions suggests she may have an obsessive-compulsive disorder. The hour she takes to brush her teeth and rereading words on the page are symptoms of compulsive behavior. Ask her doctor for referrals to psychiatrists who treat OCD.
Set the rule that she cannot work during dinner. You need to use your authority to counteract the internal pressure that demands she keep working. Obsessive-compulsive disorders make unreasonable demands on the individual, and without help she is dominated by these pressures.
Learn as much as you can about this disorder so that you will be able to choose the most effective treatment for her. OCD can be treated with medication and therapy. If other members of your family show compulsive behavior patterns report this information to the doctor to help with an accurate diagnosis.
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Q: How should I talk about sex with my 6-year-old son? He asked me where babies come from and I wasn’t sure how much information I should deliver. He has also been spending some suspicious time with the youngster next door in the bedroom with the door closed. How should I handle this?
– M.G.
A: Monitor your son and his playmates carefully and set the rule, “I don’t want you touching any person or allowing them to touch you in the private areas of your body.” This exploratory activity is common in youngsters, but your son has to learn that it is not acceptable behavior.
Listen to your son’s questions and comments about sexual topics and use them as guidelines for your talks. Gear your discussions to his level of understanding. Give him factual answers and keep your responses short. Let him follow up on your answers so he can clarify his understanding.
Send questions to Cathleen Brown, care of The Denver Post, 1560 Broadway, Denver, CO 80202 or cabrown500@yahoo.com.
