Just when you thought every NFL team might finish 8-8 one of these years, along comes the 2008 season.
In case you haven’t noticed, there are a whole lot of have-nots out there. And no, we’re not just talking about the usual suspects such as the Raiders and Lions. In Seattle, they’re calling the local 11 the Performers Formerly Known as the Seahawks. In San Diego, they’re wondering if the Chargers still have some lightning in those Bolts. And in New England, they’re one more lopsided loss away from Shannon Sharpe calling the National Guard.
So it’s official, then. One of Those Years has arrived in the Sunday football league. The NFL is more upside down than Wall Street. The Titans are undefeated, the Cardinals may run away with the NFC West, and the Eagles and Saints are in last place. You remember the Eagles. Two weeks ago, every media outlet in the country had them in the top 3 of their power rankings.
So what’s going on? Hey, stuff happens in the blocking-and-tackling business. Injuries to key players have blown up the map. Case in point: Unless Tony Romo can defy the doctors, today’s laundry list of missing QBs will include Romo, Tom Brady, Matt Hasselbeck, Jon Kitna and Carson Palmer.
On to Week 7 of the head-scratching Olympics …
Jimmy tracker
Season record: 53-35
Record vs. the spread: 44-41-3
Highlight of the week: Cardinals over the Cowboys. By the way, as if we would have picked the Seahawks over the Packers if we had known Chuckles Frye was going to suit up. He isn’t a QB; he just plays one on TV.
San Diego at Buffalo
11 a.m., pick ’em
Last meeting: Chargers won 24-21 at Buffalo on Dec. 3, 2006
Right. Like that’s LaDainian Tomlinson wearing No. 21. He needs a 90-yard run to reach 4.5 yards per. … Bills all the rage after bye weeks — 13-6 overall, 2-0 under Dick Jauron. … Bolts stopping by en route to London, where they play Saints. … FYI: Bills 4-1, but haven’t beaten a club w/winning record. … Trent Edwards expected to return after sustaining concussion vs. Cards. Edwards in 4th Q: 27-for-35, 350 yards, 3 TDs, no pix.
Prediction: Bills 20, Chargers 16
New Orleans at Carolina
11 a.m., Panthers by 3
Last meeting: Saints won 31-6 at Carolina on Nov. 25, 2007
Panthers had dominated Bucs at Tampa, but forgot to show up last week. Moral to the story: They’ll bring it in this one. … Vegas trend: Road team has covered da spread 12 straight in series. … Jake Delhomme, who threw three INTs at Tampa, in search of third straight 100-plus rating vs. ex-N’Awlins teammates.
Prediction: Panthers 31, Saints 27
Minnesota at Chicago
11 a.m., Bears by 3
Last meeting: Vikings won 20-13 at Minnesota on Dec. 17, 2007
Vikes coming off 2-pt. win, Bears off 2-pt. loss. … You knew rookie Matt Forte leads Bears in rushing. Didja know he leads ’em with 27 catches, too? Not that, you know, Bears don’t have enough playmakers. … Devin Hester in last three vs. Minnie-ha-ha: 3 PRs for TDs, one 81-yard TD catch. … Vikes won 34-31 last year at the Chi, thanks to 224 rush yards by Adrian Peterson. … ‘Sota coming off series sweep in ’07.
Prediction: Bears 30, Vikings 20
Pittsburgh at Cincinnati
11 a.m., Steelers by 9 1/2
Last meeting: Steelers won 24-10 at Pittsburgh on Dec. 2, 2007
Stillers have won six straight at Cincy. … Memo to Ocho Cinco: Don’t bother practicing your new end-zone dance this week. Hah-vud man Ryan Fitzpatrick will start at QB for Bungles. … Quirky stat du jour: Big Ben 10-0 in home state of Ohio — 5-0 at Cincy, 5-0 at Mistake by the Lake. … Willie Parker — two TD runs last season, three this year — ready to go after Pitt bye week.
Prediction: Steelers 31, Bengals 13
Tennessee at Kansas City
11 a.m., Titans by 8
Last meeting: Titans won 26-17 at Kansas City on Dec. 16, 2007
Talk about a bad week. First, Tony Gonzalez’s 401(k) goes in the drink. Then Chiefs don’t swing a deal to get him outta Dodge. … For reasons only Chiefs coaches can figure out, Brodie Croyle, 0-7 career as an NFL QB, will start for Chiefs. … Your leader in the clubhouse for NFL D player of the year? What, you mean other than Albert Haynesworth? Titans have allowed 13 pts. or fewer in 10 of last 16 with Big Al in the lineup. … Bye week & all, Tin Men lead AFC with 10 INTs.
Prediction: Titans 26, Chiefs 9
Baltimore at Miami
11 a.m., Dolphins by 3
Last meeting: Dolphins won 22-16 (OT) at Miami on Dec. 16, 2007
Remember last year’s meeting? Phish won to avoid W-less season. … Cam Cameron, Dawfins coach in ’07, now the Balt. Oh coordinator. … Like Cameron has made a big difference. It’s mid-Oct. and QB Joe Flacco has one TD toss. … Fatigue could be a factor here. Ravens playing third roadie in four weeks and will be tested by Miami run game.
Prediction: Ravens 15, Dolphins 13
San Francisco at N.Y. Giants
11 a.m., Giants by 10 1/2
Last meeting: Giants won 33-15 at the Meadowlands on Oct. 21, 2007
G-Men in last year’s rout: six sacks, four turnovers. … Who knew? Teams have been playing since leather helmets and series is tied 13-13. … Giants numero uno in offense (419 yds. per) despite the Clunker at Cleveland. … Niner-Niners have allowed league-worst 167 points.
Prediction: Giants 37, 49ers 24
Dallas at St. Louis
11 a.m., Cowboys by 7
Last meeting: Cowboys won 35-7 at Dallas on Sept. 30, 2007
Tony Romo, originally scheduled to miss three games, says he wants to play despite broken pinkie. What, Jessica kissed it and made it better? … Rams interim coach Jim Haslett 2-0 career vs. Da ‘Boys. … It isn’t just Romo. Dallas injury list longer than Pacman’s rap sheet. … Rams win! Rams win! We may not have another chance to say it, so we wanted to give ’em some love after upset at Washington.
Prediction: Cowboys 24, Rams 20
Detroit at Houston
2 p.m., Texans by 9
Last meeting: Lions won 28-16 at Detroit on Sept. 19, 2004
Lions QB Dan Orlovsky apparently thought he was playing in CFL when he ran out of end zone at Minnesota. Not that, you know, he ought to be playing in the CFL. … Texans won a game last week. Parade on Tuesday. … Little- known historical footnote: When Gary Kubiak got Houston gig, he wanted to hire Lions coach Rod Marinelli as his D coordinator. Don’t look now, but he may get the chance again.
Prediction: Texans 34, Lions 19
Indianapolis at Green Bay
2:15 p.m., Colts by 1 1/2
Last meeting: Colts won 45-31 at Indianapolis on Sept. 26, 2004
Hmmm. Colts looked suspiciously like the Colts in dubya over Baltimore. … Tony Dungy not lovin’ him some Pack: 5-9 career vs. GB. … Not that Indy doesn’t have issues: 32nd in run Oh, 29th in run D. … Paging Mr. Grant, Mr. Ryan Grant. All the rage in ’07, dude is averaging 3.4 yards per. … Pack coming off embarrassing home L to Hot’lanta. … Both teams plus-4 in TOs.
Prediction: Colts 34, Packers 30
N.Y. Jets at Oakland
2:15 p.m., Jets by 3
Last meeting: Jets won 23-3 on Dec. 31, 2006
Jets have won three straight in series. … Come on now, you didn’t have Brett the Jet penciled in for 13 TD passes in five games. Not that he’s gonna get there, but he’s on pace for a career-high 42. … Major development in No There There. The Cable Guy introduced himself to Al Davis the other day. … Favre’s go-to: Jerricho Cotchery, he of 22 grabs in past three. … Practice makes near-perfect: Raiders Shane Lechler avging 49.6 per punt.
Prediction: Raiders 24, Jets 23
Cleveland at Washington
2:15 p.m., Washington by 9
Last meeting: Browns won 17-13 at Cleveland on Oct. 3, 2004
As if politically incorrect nickname weren’t bad enough, Washington just lost to Rams. … Just wondering: Shouldn’t Falcons safety Jamaal Fudge be playing for Brownies? … Derek Anderson returned from witness-protection program to lead Cleveland to big MNF win over Da Champs. … Memo to Jason Campbell: Throw a pick already, will ya? Thru six, he’s thrown six TD passes, zero INTs.
Prediction: Redskins 27, Browns 16
Seattle at Tampa Bay
6:15 p.m., Buccaneers by 10 1/2
Last meeting: Seahawks won 20-6 at Seattle on Sept. 9, 2007
On second thought, Coach Holmgren, go ahead and retire right now. … At least they’re consistent: ‘Hawks 27th in Oh & D. … Not that it’s all their fault. ‘Hawks your basic M*A*S*H unit, missing, among others, Matt Hasselbeck. … Earnest’s Great Adventure: TB’s Earnie Graham averaging 5.6 YPC, looking for seventh straight homie with a rushing TD.
Prediction: Buccaneers 27, Seahawks 10
