There it is again. On the radio. Johnny Mathis singing “It’s Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas” for the 7 billionth time this season.
Now, I love Johnny Mathis. Who doesn’t? But, dude. It started looking like Christmas at my Kmart sometime around Halloween. How about some new material?
There. Now. On to what really kicks off Christmas, as far as I’m concerned: Rum balls. Here is my go-to recipe for my favorite yuletide cookie.
Rum Balls
Makes 3-4 dozen, depending on size. Recipe is easily doubled.
Ingredients
1 cup powdered sugar
3 tablespoons unsweetened cocoa powder
1/4 cup plus 2 tablespoons dark rum (don’t be afraid to use the good stuff)
2 tablespoons maple syrup (grade B has the best flavor) or corn syrup
3 cups vanilla wafer crumbs (about 1 box minus a few for snacking, pulsed in the food processor until crumbly but not powdery)
3/4 cup chopped pecans, walnuts or other favorite nut
More powdered sugar for rolling
Directions
In a medium bowl, whisk together powdered sugar and cocoa powder. Stir in rum and maple syrup until combined. Add wafer crumbs and nuts. Stir until combined. Mixture will be sticky.
If needed, add more wet or dry ingredients until you get the right texture — it should be sticky enough to come together in a ball but not gooey or soft.
Put about 1 cup powdered sugar into a shallow dish. Roll the crumb mixture into balls about 1 inch in diameter and drop them in the dish. Toss to coat with powdered sugar. Eat.
If you have any leftover cookies, store them in an airtight container between sheets of wax paper. They’ll keep about 3 weeks, unless someone finds them first.
Those who know me well know that I love nothing more than a boozy dessert, and these little nuggets of Christmas cheer are nothing if not boozy.
If you don’t have rum in the cupboard, you can make these with bourbon. Or Amaretto. Or, if you’re drawn that way, crème de cassis, for a peppy little razzleberry ball.
Hic!
Recently, when considering what to bake to take to friends who were hosting a holiday party, I faced a conundrum. For years, my slam-dunk hostess gift has been a box of these rum balls. But my friends have a 2-year-old and a 4-year-old and, well, a box of “Grown-up” cookies wasn’t really going to fly. I had to make something for the whole family.
I switched course and made brownies. But the experience got me thinking: Is there such a thing as a palatable nonalcoholic rum ball?
I started by trying to re-create the rum flavor by tweaking my original recipe with rum extract. What a huge mistake that was. Rum extract is caustic and unpleasant, even when hidden in among all that sugar, cocoa, nuts and crushed wafers.
Dispensing with that little bottle of yuck, I sipped my coffee and considered. There’s no way to get all the loveliness of rum without rum. It just can’t (and probably shouldn’t) be done. I’d have to find another kind of ball, one that’s just as fun as a rum ball, but different.
Sip. Hm. I regarded my coffee. Could the answer be right under my nose? Coffee? What about coffee balls? My general rule is that coffee flavor makes sense in only two places: coffee and coffee ice cream. But, what the heck, it’s Christmas.
I brewed a pot at double strength, then let it relax to room temperature before subbing it in for the rum. Not bad. In combination with the cocoa, the result was a sort of mocha ball. I liked it, but the cookie still tasted “grown-up.” Not verboten for little tummies like rum might be, but neither would the rugrats clamor for them. And, let’s face it: Half the fun of giving cookies to other people’s children is to watch them gobble them down greedily, then freak out on a sugar rush.
So, I began scouring the fridge for other liquids to replace the rum. Apple cider: not bad, but too fruity. Orange juice: oddly charming, but it turned the balls a less-appetizing shade of brown. Tea: Too dainty.
I scoured some more, pushing aside a carton of half-and-half and a jar of cocktail onions, digging deeper now into the fridge. And there, behind a jar of mustard and a wedge of fresh cheese, shone my grail: a can of A&W root beer, left over from a recent round of root beer floats.
Heart racing with the kind of anticipation that anticipates victory, I swapped the root beer for the rum. Promising. But not right. Not root-beer-y enough. I wanted to taste that sassafras flavor (however phony). I tried again, but this time with root beer that I’d reduced by half in a small saucepan over a medium flame, intensifying the flavor.
Bingo. Er, almost. I needed to get rid of the cocoa, because chocolate and root beer aren’t exactly harmonious. I compensated for the cocoa loss by reducing slightly the amount of liquid. Also, I added a tablespoon or so of melted butter, to help them set (and stay set) as they cooled.
Maple Root Beer Balls
Makes 3-4 dozen, depending on how big you make them.
Ingredients
1 cup root beer
2 tablespoons maple syrup (grade B is best; corn syrup may be substituted in a pinch)
1 tablespoon melted butter
1 cup plus 2 tablespoons powdered sugar
3 cups vanilla wafer crumbs (an 11-ounce box of wafers, pulsed several times in the food processor until crumbly, but not powdery)
3/4 cup finely chopped pecans, walnuts, or other favorite nut
More powdered sugar for rolling
Directions
Bring root beer to a boil in a small saucepan over medium-high heat. Cook until reduced to 1/3 cup. Whisk together reduced root beer, maple syrup and melted butter until combined. Add powdered sugar. Whisk. Stir in wafer crumbs and nuts. Mixture will be sticky.
If needed, add more wet or dry ingredients until you get the right texture — it should be sticky enough to come together in a ball, but not gooey. (It should crumble slightly when you bite into it.)
Put about 1 cup powdered sugar into a shallow dish. Roll mixture into balls about 1-inch in diameter and drop them in the dish. Toss to coat with powdered sugar. Chill for a bit.
If you have any leftover cookies, store them in an airtight container between sheets of wax paper. They’ll keep about 3 weeks, unless someone finds them first.
Score! A totally family-friendly Christmas ball, and if not the rum ball I will never stop loving, certainly something I could take to a friend with kids. And, I expect, equally successful with cream soda, or even cola.
Here’s an idea from my co-worker Kristen Browning-Blas: Make rum balls and Coca-cola balls. Eat one of each at the same time. Cocktail balls!
Ah, now it really is beginning to feel like Christmas.
Got a recipe that needs tinkering? Send it to dining@denverpost.com.
