Steven Stolman, a designer and author of three books, including “Confessions of a Serial Entertainer,” joined Jura Koncius to talk about the upcoming party season.
Q: With all the events that you host, you must have some tricks up your sleeve. Please share!
A: Don’t be afraid to use last-minute, store-bought stuff, but put it on your own pretty plates and destroy the evidence. Much of successful entertaining is all about smoke and mirrors.
Q: I read that you hate hostess gifts. How do we stop this custom? What about a homemade treat? And is it appropriate to add a card to your gift?
A: Buy a little single-hole punch, some plain white index cards and some ribbon at a craft store, or some of those tags with strings. Write something cute and tie it to whatever you feel you need to bring (a bottle of wine, a cellophane bag of homemade cookies, anything). That way, your efforts will not go undetected!
Q: If you hate hostess gifts, do you ever bring one? Don’t you feel weird at the party when everyone else is depositing an item on the front hall table?
A: I write beautiful, heartfelt thank-you notes, or even thank-you e-mails. That seems to do the trick because we keep on getting invited back.
Q: What’s the best way to invite people to a party? Do you think Evite or Paperless Post is good?
A: Nothing compares to beautiful printing. And now, the great old-style letterpress is in vogue. Visit your local stationery store. I do use Evites a lot for business stuff. I am grateful to receive a lot of Paperless Post () invites, but I have yet to use that site myself.
Q: I currently live in a studio apartment. What are your recommendations for setting up a small space for both living and entertaining?
A: Be fearless and do not try to disguise stuff. We have a studio apartment in New York, and believe me, the bed is right there, out in the open. But in a small space, you really need to be organized and neat. That is the most important thing. Clutter is the enemy.
Q: I have a very small dining room, and to entertain more than six people at a time (my book club), I am forced to serve a supper that can be eaten with one utensil while standing or perched on various chairs jammed into my small living room. Any tips?
A: Curry. Chicken, shrimp or vegetarian with brown rice studded with raisins. People love it, and it doesn’t require a knife.
Q: Somehow, my husband always ends up with a linen cocktail napkin in his pocket after a party.
A: Launder and send back with a sweet note. That would be charming.
Q: Even when people RSVP yes, they still beg off at the last minute. Invite 15, get 10 who say yes, then three show up. That’s why I’ve pretty much stopping having people over. Does your book address this?
A: Let’s just say that when people misbehave like that, I tend not to invite them back. I’m a firm believer that water seeks its own level. Get new friends, but don’t ever be shy about being hospitable.
Q: We only have houseguests a few times a year. Our guest bedroom is pretty pitiful. We have an air mattress (and nice bedding and guest towels) but not much else. What would you invest in?
A:A real bed. Sooner or later, you will be grateful to have it. In the meantime, it’s great for folding laundry and packing suitcases.
